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Broke-Ass Porn: FREE Bar Food

Updated: Jun 21, 2015 14:15
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Once a week we present Broke-Ass Porn.  It’s visually stimulating material for the financially impaired.  If this shit doesn’t get you going, you’re not as broke as you thought:

FREE bar food is one of the sexiest things on Earth.  It’s like the bar is saying, “You know buddy, I like you just the way you are.  You’re perfect.  You’re here anyways, might as well have a bite.  It’s on me.”

FREE bar food can range from something simple like peanuts or trail mix, to something highfalutin like quiche.  I always feel like I should eat with my pinky in the air when I have quiche.  And while most places only give out the FREE stuff during happy hour, some brilliant, shall we say chosen, ones are magnanimous enough to give it out ALL DAY LONG.  For example, the Alligator Lounge, the Crocodile Lounge, and the Charleston (all in NY) give out a personal pizza with every drink you order!  If we could afford to erect a Broke-Ass hall of fame, these institutions would be in the first class of inductees.

We’ve all had those moments when we’ve looked in our wallets and realized we had to choose between drinking and eating that night.  Here’s to FREE bar food for making that decision one and the same.

I feel I should note that, if you live in SF or NY, you don’t ever have to make that decision again!  Buy my book for either one of those cities and check out the index in the back that details where all the FREE bar food is throughout your town.  Also, wanna see me eating FREE bar food in NYC?  Then click watch this piece from the NY News.  And if you’re in SF, you should check out this piece from The Bold Italic where Justine Sharrock goes to over 10 places with FREE bar food.

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Broke-Ass Stuart - Editor In Cheap

Broke-Ass Stuart - Editor In Cheap

Stuart Schuffman, aka Broke-Ass Stuart, is a travel writer, poet, TV host, activist, and general shit-stirrer. His website BrokeAssStuart.com is one of the most influential arts & culture sites in the San Francisco Bay Area and his freelance writing has been featured in Lonely Planet, Conde Nast Traveler, The Bold Italic, Geek.com and too many other outlets to remember. His weekly column, Broke-Ass City, appears every other Thursday in the San Francisco Examiner. Stuart’s writing has been translated into four languages. In 2011 Stuart created and hosted the travel show Young, Broke, and Beautiful on IFC and in 2015 he ran for Mayor of San Francisco and got nearly 20k votes.

He's been called "an Underground legend": SF Chronicle, "an SF cult hero":SF Bay Guardian, and "the chief of cheap": Time Out New York.