Top 5 Cupcakeries in San Francisco

The man of my dreams

The man of my dreams

I like cake.  A lot.  I mean, it’s an addiction that I am not ashamed to admit by shouting it from the top of a bakery (which I am obviously about to enter to get my next fix).  I have even toyed with the idea of becoming a baker/pastry chef, but getting up at 4 AM to bake a cake for some other jerks who get to eat my delicious cakey creations just doesn’t float my boat.

In an effort to tighten my baked goods allowance (good cakes are offensively expensive btw), as well as maintain my girlish figure (HA! Right.) I have focused my obsession to cupcakes, aka fun sized foodgasms.

My roommate and I recently ventured on an epic cupcake crawl throughout the city and I have compiled for you, my cupcake loving compadres, a list of the Top 5 Cupcakeries in San Francisco. Now go! Crawl like you never learned to walk!

Warning: the hangover/food coma can be just as harsh as the kind you get from non-cupcake crawls.

5. Blissful Bites

I ride passed this happy little shop on my way to work every day and it is all I can do to not stop and ogle the goods.  Blissful Bites has regular and mini cupcakes proving that size doesn’t always matter (HA! Right.), which is good news for your wallet and wasteline. Woot! They have a Black Bottom cupcake that sounds a little dirty but makes you feel oh so good inside. Excuse me…I need a moment.

4. Kara’s Cupcakes

I sort of hated Kara’s for a while because the first time I tried one of their cupcakes the frosting was not to my liking (I am VERY particular about my frosting). They totally redeemed themselves when a coworker brought me a chocolate cupcake with coconut icing that made me almost like being at work.  The have ridiculously fluffy cake parts with what looks like a snow ball of frosting on the top.  If i had to choose a cupcake to make a bed out of, it would be these.  Mmmm…cupcake bed.

3. That Takes the Cake

These cupcakes don’t fuck around. They are dense in a good way, and the frosting makes you wish sugar and butter were the only two food groups. The peanut butter cupcake was so filling that it officially ended my first attempt at a cupcake crawl – and I am a professional. Oh. My. God. I just checked their website and they now have liquor cupcakes. My diet shall now consist of but one food. One delicious, liquor-filled food.

2. Delessio

Delessio only has mini cupcakes and that is OK by me, because those little beauties pack quite a punch.  They no longer have my favorite brownie cupcake with marshmallow and peanut butter (I just drooled a little) but after a brief and ineffective boycott I came crawling back. I’m sorry baby. You treat me right.

1. Miette

This little French gem in the Ferry Building makes me want to cry sugary tears of joy.  The cupcakes are so perfect and pretty you almost can’t eat them. But then you do, and its fawesome. My all-time-favorite is the Old Fashioned, but it’s best to eat that baby right away or you risk it melting Wicked Witch style in your pretty little cupcake carrier.  At least that is my excuse for why they never make it home…

Honorable Mention: An open letter to Safeway cupcakes.

Dear Safeway Cupcakes,

You are a little gross, but you come in a six pack and remind me of elementary school birthday parties.

I love you.

Yours Truly,

Ali

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About the author

Alison Lambert - Half Price Headliner

Ali was born and raised in the Wholesome/Creepy capital of the world, Salt Lake City, UT. Once she was old enough to blow that pop stand she escaped to the place that was the anti-SLC: The Peoples Gay-public of Drugifornia aka San Francisco (holla 30 Rock!). You can now find her throughout this glorious city slurping Pho and scheming with her best friend Pinky doing what they do every night; try and take over the world.

2 Comments

  1. Jennifer says:

    Awww…this broke my heart a lil bit. Have you tried my cupcakes?? Come on over – our store just opened a couple weeks ago, but have been in the biz for a couple years now. I promise you’ll love them. Cups and Cakes Bakery 451 9th St. b/w Bryant & Harrison.

  2. Alison Lambert - Half Price Headliner says:

    I’m so there! Sorry I missed you!

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