I’m on the left!
I have great hair. Unfortunately, it took me losing all of it to a particularly gnarly bout of cancer to really appreciate it. (Don’t worry; this isn’t going to be some faux-inspirational survival story where I pat myself on the back for making it through chemo and make everyone else feel guilty for being healthy.)
When my hair starting growing back, it was a grayish white color and super curly like Felicity‘s after she cut it all off in Season 2 to make some bizarre statement about her relationship with Ben. In sum, I wasn’t having it. The funny thing about cancer is that you really don’t give a fuck about your appearance when you’re struggling to survive, but the moment your doctor declares you in remission, your hair (or lack thereof) is all you focus on. The obsession is probably some sort of coping mechanism you use to deal with the fact that you should be dead and that your martyr roommates just spent the last few months wiping the vomit off your face and helping you to class because you were too stubborn to take time off of school. But none of that matters â€“ you’re on your way to not being bald!
In my quest to not look sickly by making my hair look as beautiful and lustrous as possible, I discovered Mane ‘n Tail shampoo and conditioner. You may have heard of this before â€“ it’s this shampoo that’s traditionally used on horses but has been adapted for human consumption. They sell it in humongous bottles at drugstores for super cheap, and it seems like it’s always on sale at my local digs (presumably because people think it’s gross and don’t want to buy it). I got my last 32 oz. bottle for $4.50 at Walgreen’s.
The best thing about this stuff is that you really do get the most bang for you buck. It makes your hair grow fast as fuck and shine like whoa. You don’t even have to use very much of it either; it lathers up like nobody’s biz and therefore lasts way longer than more expensive brands. I’ve read some consumer reviews where people say it made their hair fall out in clumps, but I started using it when I didn’t have very much hair to lose anyway so I didn’t notice. But I have a feeling that if this is true, it only happens for the first few washes. Consider it an investment!
It’s been three years since my last chemo treatment and while my hair has grown back in, I still hit this brand up for the cheap deals and the sweet results. And I’ve found it comes in handy whenever I polish off a bottle of wine by myself and then make the totally retarded decision to “revamp my look” â€“ after about a week no one notices how fucked up and crooked my “Betty Page bangs” are.