BoozeEatsSan Francisco

SF Underground Market June 4th

Flo & Frank

This whole Memorial Day three-day weekend nonsense screwed with my mental calendar and I forgot that it was Tuesday and time to provide you folks with some some cheap entertainment and, since I’m running late, even cheaper humor. So, here is my favorite joke. I don’t usually give this one so easy but forgetting a deadline just made me have flashbacks to college and I need a good laugh.

Florence and Frank live in an old folks home. The two like to mix it up. Each night Frank wheels his wheelchair to Flo’s room and they sit together for an hour while she holds his penis. Every night, the same routine. Frank rolls to Flo’s and she holds his penis for an hour. One night Frank doesn’t show up. The next day Flo sees Frank in the cafeteria. She goes over to him and says, “Frank, I waited all night for you and you never came over. What happened?” Frank apologetically says, “I’m sorry Flo but I’ve found someone else.” Flo asks, “What does she have that I don’t?” Frank says, “Parkinson’s.”

Delicious!

Oh snap. If THAT doesn’t get you hungry, I don’t know what will! Good thing the SF Underground Market is coming up. This event has been shut down in the past, probably because it’s so awesome. But they’re back and this year it’s happening in two shifts. From 11am-4pm is the “take-homeables” day market. From 4-6pm there will be an intermission and the indoor market will be closed while the vendors change over. But there will still be drinks and hot food outside. Then from 6pm-midnight is the night market with drinks, music, and hot food.

SF Underground Market
Friday, June 4th 11am-midnight
SOMArts
934 Brannan St.

$2 (this buys you admission and 2 raffle tix for an expensive dinner)

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Chloe - Pennywise Reporter

Chloe - Pennywise Reporter

Chloe's youth was split between California and Kauai, frolicking on a macadamia nut farm in the tropics and landing finally in the Bay Area. Raised by super-Jew hippies, and the youngest of three sisters, Chloe learned early the virtues of thrift, economy, and green living. To the chagrin of her parents (who hoped, of course, for a Jewish doctor or lawyer), Chloe has put her degree from UC Berkeley to great use by becoming a folk singer. As "Chloe Makes Music" she plays shows throughout SF and beyond, donning vintage frocks, selling handmade merch, and pinching pennies as she sings for her supper. Calling Berkeley home for the last six years, you can think of Chloe as the website's East Bay Correspondent, opening your eyes to the hippie-filled, tree-hugging, organic-loving, vegan-eating, but way-overlooked and awesome assets of Berkeley, Oakland, and beyond.

  • Grace O’Malley

    I have an actual Uncle Frank and Aunt Florence, who we call Frank and Flo!!! They’re about 85 years old…this just freaked me out.

  • that’s hilarious! You should send in a photo fo them and we’ll put it up instead 🙂