Bacardi Torched Cherry is a Waste of Money

Maybe it’s because I’m getting iced and weised left and right, but I am just so into new alcohol trends right now. I’m on such a roll that I’m even down to try the ones that look gross, which is why I’m currently in the possession of a bottle of Bacardi Torched Cherry.

Let me paint a picture: I’m sitting here in front of my computer, drinking a glass of this Bacardi mixed with Diet Coke like the ad says to do (home alone, but we don’t have to talk about that). As I sip on this drink and cringe, I’m wondering why I bought into this disgusting ass booze hype.


image courtesy of Moosylvania

For starters, the graphics in this campaign are stupid. At first glance, this spiky vine is very unsettling. It looks like alien arms and the way it’s wrapped around the bottle seems to say, “Stop! Don’t drink this! It tastes like poison and will stab your liver the way it’s stabbing through this cherry.” And you know what? It sort of feels like that every time I swallow.

When you actually read the text in the ad, you realize that the spiked alien arms are actually supposed to represent the “torched plant aloe” that’s in the alcohol. When I saw this, I got really irritated – you either call it a “torch plant” or you call it “aloe,” but it’s never both. Repetition is very important in advertising – I know – but come on. The only reason the torch plant is mentioned is so people better understand why “torched’ is in the name of the drink, but does this drink’s target audience really give a shit about etymology?

But what really gets my goat about this ad is the way that refreshing glass of cola seems to be getting pulled away from me by those wretched aloe vines. Are you really gonna take my Diet Coke away from me? Fuck you. We’re through.

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About the author

Rebecca Pederson - Cheap Date

Rebecca graduated from UC Santa Cruz with a degree in Literature, but she tells everyone she majored in Psychology so they don't ask her for book recommendations. She likes coffee, pickles, free yoga classes, and spends a lot of time with her dog.
  • Nate

    you should try it with a carbonated lemonade…tastes like a bombpop

  • Eric

    You are probably not the target consumer, which knowing the industry, is a probably male. Those unsettling arms are aggressive and probably meant to appeal to a male audience.I’m a guy and I think it looks mean and cool. It looks like something much cooler than your girly Malibu stuff.

    Question #1 – How long did you sit and stare at this ad? Seems like a long time. I would say it’s a success if most people take that long to look at it.

    Question #2 – Why does rum make you soooo angry. It should make you happy.

  • beer girl anyway

    I am with Eric, you should not be that angry at the rum, it may (or may not) be the reason that you are alone :)

    I think your first mistake was following the directions…really, what guy does that…. diet coke cannot be a good mix with this…why not just bacardi and cherry coke? Try it with squirt or fresca…way better.

  • http://somethingawful.com demons_souls

    LOL Diet Coke????????????????????????????????????????????? WTF?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!

    Drink it with REGULAR Coke!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

    Your dumb!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! ☆ミ(o*・ω・)ノイッテキマ-ス!!

  • C. Richards

    My boyfriend mixed us up a beverage last week using a sample size of Torched Cherry that came free with the full-sized bottle of white rum, and it was out of this world. He added the Torched Cherry to a purple fruit/ veggie juice blend we had in the fridge (like V8-Fusion Blueberry Pommegranate or Acai Mixed Berry) and a half-can of Fresca. We even had some cherries & mint leaves to garnish it. AMAZING!!

  • http://www.toxicat.com kara

    I love this stuff. I shoot it and sip Dr Pepper.

  • that one guy

    Club soda……. some fresh limes………..and a shot of some simple syrup and you have yourself a delicious spiked cherry limeade……..great in the summertime

    Just wondering why you would have thought or even trusted someone else that diet coke would taste good in anyway shape or form

  • rich

    Like Cara above- this stuff is great with Dr Pepper. Went through two bottles a night during the last 4th of July vaca. It was a definite hit.

  • sarah

    Didn’t care for it mixed with diet coke, but it is AMAZING with Red Bull Zero