ALL ABOUT OUR HOT-ASS WRITERS

  • Good Bye Tom Petty

    I am a writer, DJ, musician, vandal and I travel a lot.

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  • How to Protest Safely and Responsibly

    I am a writer, DJ, musician, vandal and I travel a lot.

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  • This is the Hippest Beatnik Walkin’ Tour

    I am a writer, DJ, musician, vandal and I travel a lot.

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  • Punks With Lunch Keep Serving It Up In Oakland

    I am a writer, DJ, musician, vandal and I travel a lot.

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  • Taking Food from the Rich & Feeding the Poor in the Bay Area

    I am a writer, DJ, musician, vandal and I travel a lot.

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  • The Basic First Aid Moves You Should Know

    I am a writer, DJ, musician, vandal and I travel a lot.

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  • A Broke-Ass Tour of Movies Shot in San Francisco

    I am a writer, DJ, musician, vandal and I travel a lot.

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  • Being a 20-something Dominatrix in the Bay Area

    I am a writer, DJ, musician, vandal and I travel a lot.

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  • Why Everyone Should Work in a Restaurant

    Rae, known also (depending on the country) as Rachelle/Raquel/ Rachele (and often sadly mistaken as Richard, because biblical names are hard you guys) is an aspiring writer and now sort of a dick for having actually defined herself as such. She was born and lived over the first half of her life in Italy; she then moved to the States and lived a good ten years there (including in SF). Currently back in Europe, she is neither a hapless American tourist nor a snobby European jerkyjerk; luckily for you, she is some weird ungodly combination of both. Also, she’s broke and is probably stealing bread crumbs from pigeons.

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  • We Need to Build Housing, Not Ugly Hi-Rises On Landfill

    P Segal is a San Francisco native, writer, therapist, and life coach. Literary agents have called her a clever niche writer, but none of them can figure out what the hell her niche is.

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  • FiveThirtyEight Poll Confirms Hillary Clinton Is Antichrist

    Joe Kukura is a two-bit marketing writer who excels at the homoerotic double-entendre. He is training to run a full marathon completely drunk and high, and his work has appeared in the New York Times and Wall Street Journal on days when their editors made particularly curious decisions.

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  • How To Crash All of Apple’s Best WWDC Parties For Free

    Joe Kukura is a two-bit marketing writer who excels at the homoerotic double-entendre. He is training to run a full marathon completely drunk and high, and his work has appeared in the New York Times and Wall Street Journal on days when their editors made particularly curious decisions.

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  • Broke-Ass Stuart – Editor in Cheap

    I've been called "an Underground legend": SF Chronicle , "an SF cult hero": SF Bay Guardian, and "the chief of cheap": Time Out New York, but to those familiar with my work, I'm just "that douchebag who writes books about cheap stuff and drinks a lot".

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  • Enrique Grijalva – Mr. Minimum Wage (Editor, New York)

    My father came, my mother saw...and I conquered. I encourage children to do drugs, I buy alcohol for teenagers, and I drink beer with the homeless. In my spare time, I attend art galleries for the FREE booze while rubbing elbows with modish elephants. I also hammer six-inch nails into small penises. Stuart knighted me as Broke-Ass King of New York. You've been warned.

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  • Illyanna

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  • Stephen Torres – Threadbare-Fact Finder (Editor, San Francisco)

    Stephen's early years were spent in a boxcar overlooking downtown Los Angeles. From there he moved around the state with his family before settling under the warm blanket of smog that covers suburban Southern California. Moving around led to his inability to stay in one place for very long, but San Francisco has been reeling him back in with its siren song since 1999. By trade he pours booze, but likes to think he can write and does so occasionally for the SF Bay Guardian, Bold Italic and 7x7. He also likes to enjoy time spent in old eateries, bars and businesses that, by most standards, would have been condemned a long time ago.

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  • Freddie Cosmo – Associate Debtitor

    Freddie Cosmo is a recording artist from Philadelphia, PA. living in New York City by way of Miami. He spent all his money on undergrad music school and feels as though he owes all musicians (and the universe for that matter) the most accurate information on how to be broke without giving up on their dreams. He would like to shamelessly invite you to check out his music at www.soundcloud.com/freddie-cosmo.

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  • ennifer-Nilenie-Broke-Ass-Stuart-NYC

    Jennifer Nilenie – The Destitute-Social Critic

    Writing for the heck of it since she was an eight-year-old, Jenny Nilenie now seeks social justice through her voice and any other medium she can access. She’s the creator of Jin-Editos; a self-published collection of books featuring essays, poetry and short stories intended for the working class and a few wealthy, nosy bodies. Puerto Rican born black-and-proud female, who’s residing in New York, and knows what it's like to be an immigrant in a city that is both harsh and exiting. She loves to poison train rider-ears with her poetry and is often rewarded by not getting beat up.

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  • P Segal- Bohemian Archivist

    P Segal is a San Francisco native, writer, therapist, and life coach. Literary agents have called her a clever niche writer, but none of them can figure out what the hell her niche is.

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  • Badinage – Senior Drug Analyst

    I wanted to be a 'traveling bartender' and live in every major city for 6 months and have a girlfriend and a boyfriend in each city. At the end, I would pick my favorite destination and live there permanently. I've lived in Amsterdam, Boston, Chicago, Denver, and Madison Psychiatric Ward in the corner room on the top bunk that we decided to keep on the floor.

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  • Chloe Newsom – Dive Bar Desperado

    I like kittens, 40s, cupcakes, pizza, metal, thigh-highs, weekends, travelling, and parks. Lemmy is god. That's...that about covers it.

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  • J. Sharelle – Ms. Do-It-Yourself

    Brooklyn born-and-bred poet & songwriter, J. Sharelle has been organizing and performing in NYC since 2005. She began with spoken word events and has since evolved to live performances, backed by a full band. At a young age, J. Sharelle’s life began to change and innocence grew dim. Family was changing, people who once meant everything were gone. Knowing very little about music, she found freedom from the pain of loved ones lost in melodies. At a tender age music became everything —most of all her means to cope with hardships. "When I was 7, I memorized my first song…it was Audio2’s 1987 classic, “Top Billin”. It was refreshingly different then my uncles 70’s slow jams or those tear-jerking gospel hymns my grandmother played. It was then that I realized there was music for every occasion. I can picture myself with ponytails, a gold chain, and cut up denim shorts in the mix of a fish fry, a card game or better yet a block party, and not because I cared about the festivities but because I wanted to be where the music was no matter the outcome". J. Sharelle’s writing embarks on love & life; truth & emotions; triumph & loss. Her writings evoke the passion of a spoken word artist combined with finesse of a R&B artist. Giving life to the art of songwriting, J. Sharelle breathes power and passion back to words.

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  • Kaetan Mazza – The Broke-Joke-Who-Enjoys-a-Toke

    Kaetan Mazza currently resides on the couches of his friends, family and, sometimes in the beds of some very altruistic strangers, around the NYC metro area. He is motivated by publicly mocking and ridiculing himself and others. His literary heroes are Christopher Hitchens and Chelsea Handler.

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  • Matt Fink – Fatt Mink

    I was born into a family of bookworms and staunch pinkos in downtown San Jose, California. I lived in San Francisco from 2002-2016, during which time I studied music and Italian at S.F State and worked as a waiter and bartender in restaurants and bars both foul and divine; I credit my considerable experience in the industry with birthing my eternal burnin' love for food and booze, still a driving force in my life. I lived in Rome for 8 months in 2016 and then moved to Guadalajara, Mexico, where I currently write for a newspaper and play music.

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  • Fabian Echevarria – Frugal Photo Pro

    Known for a highly developed sense of thrift amongst friends and coworkers, Fabian’s gift of making that minimum wage paycheck last is hard to beat. Two things you can count on with Fabian: he always packs a lunch and brings his own cheap booze. He also seems to have a knack with his favorite media, photography.You could find him at parks, beaches, and night life events throughout San Francisco, camera generally in hand. You can also follow him at https://www.fbfe.me

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  • Carrie Laven – Pretty Penniless

    Carrie Laven is a natural-born storyteller from California, but she lives in New York now. She likes dogs, nail art, and Mexican food, but mostly she likes scoring sweet deals at thrift stores. She tends to have a flair for the dramatic.

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  • Jessica Longo – Out the Door Special

    Jessica was born, moved around a lot and has an odd dialect to prove it (see: hella, bubbler, and cawfee), and is now precariously settled in SF. Despite graduating high school too many years ago to count, she was crowned Prom Queen this summer and considers her life complete now. Last year her production editing job was outsourced to the Philippines. Hope they like it. Luckily for you, this Lady of Leisure is currently accepting applications for the position of Wealthy Benefactor.

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  • Nate Cox – Low-Budget Literati

    Nate was born in the People's Republic of Berkeley and has gotten weirder ever since. After pursuing an economically unwise degree in Literature at UCSB, he has returned to the Bay to try this whole starving artist thing. Get him drunk enough and he will tell you about everything from Aboriginal Australian languages to jazz theory to how he coulda been a contendah. In his spare time, he looks at satellite images on Google Earth of places he will never go.

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  • Amber Bouman – Crafty & Cashless

    A freelance writer, blogger and poet based in San Francisco, Amber has written for PC World, InfoWorld, and the 16th & Mission Review. She has performed at City Hall, Litquake, the Brainwash, 16th & Mission, BlueSix, and SFSU among other places. Amber is also consummate fan of swearing, organizational freak, yoga practitioner, music geek, caffeine addict, and tattoo enthusiast who enjoys platform shoes, making out, thumb wrestling and fighting the good fight. She owns a bicycle named Gretel, a motor scooter named Elroy and a cat named Simon. She can be found in various virtual locations all over your interwebs.

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  • Stephen Jackson – In Therapy

    For the most part, Stephen wanders around looking for people to talk to. Born in Manhattan and raised in Santa Monica, he's been cultivating the skill of living large on a dime since he began hoarding his juice boxes in preschool. Currently, the majority of his time is spent raising a dog and feigning wealth.

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