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StonesTown Mall To Be Converted Into Mixed Use Neighborhood

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Did you know San Francisco has a mall? No, not the Westfield, but like a suburban ass, big movie theater-havin’, legit ass fucking mall. It’s called Stonestown and it’s a stone’s throw from SF State. Well, there’s some good news, the area is gonna get a shit ton more housing! 

I know what you’re thinking if we just do this 10,000 more times we’re going to reach that goal of 80k houses in no time. 

Spoiler alert: We’re not going to, but hey, let’s pretend. 

The residential units are taking center stage in this transformation, with the count increasing from the initially proposed 2,900 to a more substantial 3,500. It seems like Stonestown is aiming to become the neighborhood everyone wants to move to, or perhaps they just enjoy a good game of residential Tetris.

In a surprising move, the plan has nixed a 200-room hotel and opted for a staggering 4,861 parking spaces instead. Because let’s face it, what’s more comforting than knowing you have enough parking spaces to host a small car expo?

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Office space at the site has been scaled down from the initial 200,000 square feet to a more modest 100,000 square feet. Apparently, less office space means more room for community vibes – or maybe just fewer meetings.This isn’t a surprise considering San Francisco is currently experiencing its highest office vacancy rate in the city’s modern history. 

At the heart of this transformation lies the vision to evolve Stonestown Galleria from a retail-centric hub into a multifaceted town center. Brookfield’s senior director of development, Christie Donnelly, emphasized during the hearing that the updated plan “sets the framework for how we will transform Stonestown.” This evolving identity is slated to include six acres of open space, a series of residential towers, bike and pedestrian pathways, and a retail-lined “main street” along 20th Avenue.

I’m hopeful that this will actually come to fruition. While all of San Francisco is notoriously slow to build housing, the west side of the city seems to literally hate housing. I think if the Stonestown redevelopment project is successful, it could set a positive precedent and potentially warm the west side’s heart to a much needed construction boom. 

But who knows, this is San Francisco after all and the project could get disrupted because the building casts a shadow on a historic mailbox that Jerry Garcia dropped mail off in or some shit. 

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Abraham Woodliff - Bay Area Memelord

Abraham Woodliff - Bay Area Memelord

Abraham Woodliff is an Oakland-based writer, editor and digital content creator known for Bay Area Memes, a local meme page that has amassed nearly 200k followers. His work has appeared in SFGATE, The Bold Italic and of course, BrokeAssStuart.com. His book of short stories, personal essays and poetry entitled Don't Drown on Dry Ground is available now!