All posts by Chloe Newsom - Dive Bar Desperado

michael-jordan-valentine

Broke Ass Last Minute Valentine’s Day Ideas

We’ve all been there, dude. You’re happily single, […]

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disney-land

Dear Everyone: Shut Up About How Much LA Sucks*

*I’m talking to myself, too. Aloha, ladies and gentlemen. It’s been a while, I know, omg whatever, but I’m still in LA and it’s almost been a whole year -

chloe-newsom

Why Starting a Cult is a Great Way to Stop Being Broke

If this doesn't convince you, then IDK.

I’m fucking broke, man. I’m broke. And Groupon/Lifebooker/whatever discount website is trendy right now, is not REALLY

mr_rogers_helpers_quote

This Week Sucks, and I’m So Sorry

Hey. Are you ok? Shitty week, right. To say the least. Are you feeling anxious? Did you have a friend at the Boston Marathon? Perhaps, a friend of a friend

van

I Sold My Soul and Moved from Portland to Los Angeles

 This is what I look like when I'm moving. Or, drunk. Or both.

I haven’t written anything in a while because I have been moving. And

bored-to-death

Four Ways To Possibly Get Rid of Writer’s Block

OK so let’s just jump right into it, because I’m fucking bored, perpetually heartbroken this week, and just not really into anything. Usually that’s when

winter

How to Not Murder Yourself in Portland This Winter

Like most people that live in Portland right now, you’re probably thinking something along the lines of “the sky is grey, everything is grey, the choices I make

hitchhiker

Portland, You’re a Dirty Little Slut

Some dude who is probably leaving Portland after a one-year stand.

Portland, my little city of dreams. I love you so much. Everyone claims to love

todd-akin

Dear Todd Akin: I Don’t Want You to Die but I Wouldn’t Really Care if You Did

"I think the underlying notion that we should be making decisions on behalf of women for their health care decisions, or qualifying forcible rape versus non-forcible rape,

Chris-nieratko

Skateboards, Pornstars, and Fatherhood (Chris Nieratko’s Life is Better Than Yours)

This was Chris and Chris's Christmas Card one year

I've known Chris Nieratko for like five years now. I first met him when my friend Sarah