Listen up boys! I’m about to drop some real wisdom here, and you might be disappointed to learn that your sexual approach is all wrong. No, real life is not a porno and women don’t just get wet at the sight of your dick. We need foreplay and have fantasies
While the rest of us were screwing around with all that Chipotle nonsense, the Centers For Disease Control and Prevention, otherwise known as the CDC, were launching its latest ad campaign geared towards women and fetal alcohol syndrome. Unfortunately it read more like a fundamentalist Christian attack on your vagina,
I used to have an iTunes playlist called Music To Fuck To, a curated aural orgy of thumping bass and wah-wah guitar glory. All the obvious songs were there—”Whole Lotta Love,” “Come Together,” “Lebanese Blonde.” Naturally, I played it one night when I was giving a platonic massage to
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Might as Well Face it You’re Addicted to Sex I had sex with a married woman in the backseat of my Boss’s car. She began flicking her tongue between my thighs while my Boss was driving down 6th St. At 8th St. her nipple slid onto my clitoris while a
A job interview is like dating, or is dating like a job interview? You know where I’m going here. You sit down with a stranger for an allotted amount of time and you try to impress each other with bullshit. You spend so much time preparing for these meetings, but
There are two questions people ask me right off the bat when I tell them I just completed 40 Tinder dates in 40 days…
Most of us have heard the dull and alliterative hip-hop proverb: you can’t turn a ho into a housewife. It’s a relatively new incarnation of a very old idea that probably comes from the Old Testament or some other terrible book. While the wording has changed throughout the years the