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A Party Giving the Middle Finger to your New Year’s Resolution

Updated: Jan 30, 2014 12:43
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Special discount for BAS readers: Use discount code BROKEASS for $10 off tickets!!

Buy your tickets here!!

We all knew you weren’t gonna keep that New Year’s Resolution you made, so why not come blow it off with a bunch of other New Years relapsers? There will be chocolate, bacon, booze, Ploom vaporizers, loud music, sultry performances, giveaways and all the other things you’ve been craving since January 1st. Come celebrate with us because it feels too good not to.

To begin with there will be be a hosted bar by Glen Grant scotch from 9-10pm while supplies last. Then, while J Boogie, Richie Panic, DJ Omar, and Kimmy Le Funk are making motherfuckers dance till they sweat through their clothes, Fera’wyns Artisan Choclates will be giving out samples all night. That’s not decadent enough though, I mean we are giving your New Year’s Resolutions the middle finger, right? So there will also be a corset fashion show (meow!) being put on by Dark Garden, and Good Vibrations will be spinning their “Wheel of Pleasure” where you can win sinful goodies to use on yourself, your partner, or maybe a new friend…

Oh, but we’re not done yet, not by a long shot. The sexy and gorgeous Golden Gate Dolls will be performing incredible feats on the bar top and in the air, all while the Bacon Bacon Truck sits outside selling it’s heavenly wares. And for those of you who want VIP treatment, Ploom will have its private lounge where you can sample their premium vaporizers. VIP Hour will be from 8-9 and will include a hosted bar by Glen Grant, chocolate tastings, food from the Bacon Bacon Truck, and exclusive performances. VIPs also get exclusive access to the Ploom Lounge all night where among other things, there will be a private bar, exclusive performances, and tastings of Ploom‘s products.

I bet you’re getting sweaty just thinking about all this sin. Luckily you can offset your conscience by knowing that some good will be coming of all this debauchery; a portion of the night’s proceeds will be going to Project Open Hand who provides meals and counseling to people living with HIV/AIDS.

So please join us on January 30th to throw off the shackles of your stupid New Year’s Resolutions and celebrate by being the wicked creature that you really are. See you soon.

Buy your tickets here!!

The F*ck Your New Year’s Resolution Party
Thursday January 30th
9pm – 2am
Monarch
101 6th St. @ Mission
[Soma]
$10 off for BAS readers!

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Broke-Ass Stuart - Editor In Cheap

Broke-Ass Stuart - Editor In Cheap

Stuart Schuffman, aka Broke-Ass Stuart, is a travel writer, poet, TV host, activist, and general shit-stirrer. His website BrokeAssStuart.com is one of the most influential arts & culture sites in the San Francisco Bay Area and his freelance writing has been featured in Lonely Planet, Conde Nast Traveler, The Bold Italic, Geek.com and too many other outlets to remember. His weekly column, Broke-Ass City, appears every other Thursday in the San Francisco Examiner. Stuart’s writing has been translated into four languages. In 2011 Stuart created and hosted the travel show Young, Broke, and Beautiful on IFC and in 2015 he ran for Mayor of San Francisco and got nearly 20k votes.

He's been called "an Underground legend": SF Chronicle, "an SF cult hero":SF Bay Guardian, and "the chief of cheap": Time Out New York.