Arts and Culture

My name is Inigo Montoya…

Sign up for the best newsletter EVER!


A few weeks ago a baby was born here in The Bay with 12 functioning fingers and 12 functioning toes.  Fucking wild right?  What, you don’t believe me?  Then click, here and read the article.  Hearing about this of course made me think of The Princess Bride, and how Inigo Montoya wants to find the six fingered man and say, “Hello.  My name is Inigo Montoya.  You killed my father.  Prepare to die.”


The cool thing is that since all the digits are working, the doctors don’t want to amputate the extra ones.  They say that the kid could end up being a virtuosic musician or typist.  While I completely agree, I also feel that the extra pressure of being a social outcast might cause the kid to grow up and make a living giving virtuosic back alley hand jobs.  Then again the Coney Island Sideshow might be looking for some new acts too.


Wow!  I’m sorry about that one folks.  I was partying until 5 am after the Grand Opening of The Church Key last night, and the Jehovah’s Witnesses rang my doorbell at 10 this morning.  I haven’t been able to get back to sleep, so I’m a little loopy.  Don’t worry, I’m totally gonna get Jehovah back though; next time he passes out drunk, I’m gonna write all over him.


Like this article? Make sure to sign up for our mailing list so you never miss a goddamn thing!
Previous post

Free beer and wine tastings at The Church Key tonight!

Next post

Mistaken Identity and Sexy Stories

Broke-Ass Stuart - Editor In Cheap

Broke-Ass Stuart - Editor In Cheap

Stuart Schuffman, aka Broke-Ass Stuart, is a travel writer, poet, TV host, activist, and general shit-stirrer. His website is one of the most influential arts & culture sites in the San Francisco Bay Area and his freelance writing has been featured in Lonely Planet, Conde Nast Traveler, The Bold Italic, and too many other outlets to remember. His weekly column, Broke-Ass City, appears every other Thursday in the San Francisco Examiner. Stuart’s writing has been translated into four languages. In 2011 Stuart created and hosted the travel show Young, Broke, and Beautiful on IFC and in 2015 he ran for Mayor of San Francisco and got nearly 20k votes.

He's been called "an Underground legend": SF Chronicle , "an SF cult hero": SF Bay Guardian, and "the chief of cheap": Time Out New York.


  1. February 1, 2009 at 11:36 am

    Wow. How is anybody going to know if he’s giving them the bird, though? I mean, which one’s the middle finger? 🙂


  2. Broke-Ass Stuart - Editor In Cheap
    February 2, 2009 at 2:01 pm

    Very very good question 🙂