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Anna G’s Best of Overheard In NY

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If you don’t know about Overheard in New York, you clearly have a job that isn’t boring as shit.  However, even if you do have a real job where you do stuff, you should really consider taking a stop here on the LAUGH train-o-Internet for this, amIright!?  Here are my all-time favorites:

1.  Hobo and Windex

[The subway doors open. A hobo enters, holding a bottle of windex in one hand and a tube of toothpaste in the other]
Which is the better time to read Dostyevsky? Winter?

[He sprays the windex]
Hobo: Or Spring?
[He squeezes toothpaste out of the tube]
Japanese Girl: Spring!
Hobo: You are correct.

2. 5th Avenue & 9th St

Twentysomething guy: The quality of life here is so bad…I mean, if you enjoy drinking all night and having random sex, you’ll like living in New York.

3. Astoria-bound N Train Inspiration

Conductor: Never give up on life.  Keep hope alive.  This is 30th Avenue.

4. 6th Ave & 17th St.

Mother with little girl: Excuse me. My daughter wants to know if you’re a pirate.
Woman wearing bandana: No. I’m just a lesbian.

5. Well, they’ve got to relieve the stroller congestion somehow

Small child in stroller: Mommy, why did you wake me up? Don’t wake me up when I’m sleeping!
Mom: Fine. I’ll leave you on the train and you can miss your stop and then the rats will get you.

6. Wise Woman in Union Square

Woman on cell: When sex turns into math, you’ve got trouble on your hands.

7. Hobos are the best

Suit on cell: If he doesn’t get me the fucking money, I’ll kill that bitch!
Hobo: How about you give me some money, and I’ll kill that bitch?

8. Hold Me Closer, Tony Danza

Guy on cell: Um, I think I just saw Tony Danza ride past me on roller blades.
Tony Danza: Yeah, ya did!

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Anna G - Caliburg Contributor

Anna G - Caliburg Contributor

Anna G. is a Southern California native living in the Williamsburg area of Brooklyn since 2005. Anna is constantly trying to unite her love of CA sunshine and the excitement of the New York urban jungle, all the while trying to keep her unwieldy credit card debt under control, and look fabulous at brunch, no matter how un-showered and hungover.