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My Awesome Invention

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I come from a long line of inventors.  The most highly developed in our lineage was my grandpa Ralph.  It all began, he told me, when he invented a basket that he lowered from his second floor bedroom as a child, into the kitchen below.  He claimed that his mother would then place candy in the basket and he would haul it up and devour it.  The biggest problem with most of Ralph’s inventions (this candy basket is no exception) is that they have a very small consumer target.  For the basket, par example, one would need to have suitable second floor bedroom.  Also you would need a hole in your floor, it would need to be above the kitchen'and, oh yeah, waiting in the kitchen below would need to be a mother with candy.  So, in my professional assessment, this invention works as a charming childhood anecdote and not as a viable product.

In my Grandfather’s last invention, though, I see some real potential.  When he was 90 Ralph made a work out video for the elderly that could be done completely in bed.  When I say he made it, I mean he starred in it.  In his pajamas.  With moves he made up himself.  Unfortunately, he is not a doctor so there is a very large liability issue involved in this venture.  He had a professional voice over (very sweet of you Uncle Jack) and even made a website on which to hawk the video.  When traffic to the site never managed to pick up Ralph started cold calling the elderly to try to drum up interest.  I don’t know if he managed to sell any videos but I think he was on to something.  Unlike the candy basket example above, this item has some real traction.  Old people can’t be bothered to get out of bed to work out.  And there are PLENTY of lazy old people out there!  So, I think with a solid marketing plan and some investors this thing could have really been the '˜big one’ for which Grandpa was waiting all those years.  Unfortunately, since his death, the video has become a piece of nostalgia in place of a viable moneymaker.

As is my birthright, I, myself, have many inventions and business ideas.  For instance, the '˜Rojama’ (patent pending): a precursor to the snuggie, it is essentially made of '˜feety pajamas’ that transform into a robe with the magic of Velcro.  I thought it could even be customizable with a '˜tool belt’ add on for remote controls or for older folks: an emergency life alert button and pill cases.  I am stalled on the project because I am searching for the ideal business partner who can bring dollars (or yen, or euros etc etc) to the project.  The ideal person must have cash and a burning passion to put my ideas into reality.  If I did ever find this partner (call me!) I would most certainly set up shop in these coop offices in Brooklyn.


Common Spaces on Flatbush Avenue allows members to rent space in a cooperative environment.  An ecofriendly space decorated with 'œbeautiful reclaimed furniture', Common Spaces even offers flexible arrangements for people who need an option to the Starbucks office.  It even has a commercial kitchen for those business ventures that are really cooking.

Listen'about the Rojama'please don’t steal my idea'.I mean it'.I still plan on making the Rojama dream a reality so please don’t steal it'.please.  That said, if you have some money, you want to go into business and you like Common Spaces'CALL ME!

Common Spaces
33 Flatbush Ave, 5th Floor
Brooklyn, NY 11217

Photos by this Gal

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Christine Witmer - Sparing Stringer

Christine Witmer - Sparing Stringer

Christine was born and raised in the land of the Pilgrims, Plymouth, Massachusetts. She turned in her buckled shoes when she moved to NYC to attend NYU. From that esteemed University she received her BFA in theatre as well as a Master's Degree in Performance Studies in 2004.
Now an actor, writer and broke ass day-jobber, Christine juggles her many personas with the elegance of a red panda. specifically the one in the Prospect Park Zoo . . . soooooo cute! She can be found most often in her own habitat on the Northside of Williamsburg, Brooklyn.