How I feel about The Strand Bookstore
This piece originally appeared the Broke-Ass Stuart’s Guide to Living Cheaply in New York City
You know how in commercials the Keebler Elves always seem like they’re having a great time because their job rocks and they’re making people happy by baking delicious cookies? Next time one of those commercials comes on, look into the Elves’ eyes and you will catch fleeting glimpses of pure terror. It’s like they know that if they don’t convince you of how great their jobs are, there’s gonna be hell to pay when the cameras turn off.Those Elves are dancing and grinning for their lives. Whoever employs those little guys must be kicking the shit out of them on a nightly basis, and I’m pretty sure that the same person runs The Strand.
The only difference is that the people who work at The Strand are in open rebellion, they want you to know how much they hate their jobs. It’s the only plausible conclusion that I could come up with considering how amazing The Strand is. How could you hate working at one of the best used bookstores in the world, a place famous for having 18 miles of books, unless they were chaining you to the wall and attaching a car battery to your genitals every night ?The only other explanation is that The Strand exclusively hires total fucking assholes. I wonder which of these explanations is true.
PS I heard the Elves tried to go on a hunger strike, but that they just couldn’t resist eating those delectable baked goods.
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