Arts and Culture

Smellebrities

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Sometimes you’ll look at a celebrity and know immediately what it’s like to hang out with them. Brad Pitt, for example, is clearly smug and pretentious, especially when he’s stoned. I imagine Al Pacino to be kind of jumpy and paranoid, Guy Fieri to be steeped in a rendered glaze of self-loathing, and Jessica Simpson to be a terrible driver and constantly snacking.

These are things we can glean merely from watching their movies or shows, and taking cursory glances at the tabloids. Some celebrities, however, have such outsize personas with clearly tangible animas, that it actually stimulates the olfactory senses.

So what do the famous folks of today smell like?  Let’s see!

Taylor Momsen: Marlboro Lights, Cheapo Bodywash, Hair Extension Glue

Katy Perry: Stale Pez, rubbing alcohol

Ben Stiller: Aftershave, toothpaste, self-doubt

Courtney Love: Melting plastic, Marlboro Reds, Lady Speed Stick

Keira Knightley: Unicorn tears, Splenda

Tyra Banks: “Angel” by Thierry Mugler, Ice Cream, Baby Powder, Weave Glue

Angelina Jolie: Leather, baby formula, the faint odor of an electrical fire

Jennifer Aniston: Green tea body wash, Zoloft, despair

Matthew McCounaghey: Hemp soap, Bengay, resin

Gwyenth Paltrow: The most expensive yoga studio ever built

Thanks to Mr Cotobato for his assistance with this important project.

Photo courtesy of drfunkenberry.com

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BAS Writers

BAS Writers

BAS Writers is mostly a collection of articles written by people for the early days of this site. Back then nobody knew that snarky articles they were writing could come back and haunt them when job searching a decade later.