What The Things I Bought Today Say about Me
At a time when what you buy is equated with who you are, few things are more personally enlightening than a trip to the store. This is something I believe with a bit more fervor than I should. (Reason: It’s reductive and only partially true.) Still, lets pretend that it’s through what we buy that we get closest to understanding our own souls. Our receipts are mirrors, and in them we see ourselves. This was my Today.
Mass Effect
Mass Effect is one of the many recent Xbox 360 games with an internal morality engine. Like the Fable series, Grand Theft Auto V, and Fallout 3, Mass Effect is rife with pivotal moments whose results reverberate long after they occur. Killing a character, for example, even a seemingly unimportant one, can preclude your hero from participating in a later side quest. Mass Effect, in short, is a game based almost entirely of of personal choice.
That’s compelling to me, but for reasons that I don’t actually understand fully. Maybe its because at a time where my personal decisions seem to err on the side of misfortune, playing a game and making decisions whose ramifications don’t actually matter is the perfect antidote. It’s decision making lite. Buying Mass Effect was me conceding to the reality that making decisions in real life sucks. Also, it has guns.
Burger King Smoky Cheddar Steakhouse Burger
After a year-and-a-half of riding the veggie train, I joined the hordes of the lapsed vegetarians. Now, I eat burgers and chicken sandwiches and hot dogs (almost) completely guilt free. Today, I had a Burger King Smoky Cheddar Steakhouse Burger, which is apparently aimed at men from the age of 24 to 36. It’s supposedly for a more sophisticated customer, but I don’t feel any more sophisticated after eating it. Just really bloated and nauseous, which is my usual reaction to Burger King.
Christmas Cards
Christmas cards are one of those things that so strongly reek of capitalist aggression that it seems silly to attack them. Besides, they were for my grandmother, and I trust her wisdom more than I trust in the dollar bill. I paid $7.99 for a intricately-designed set depicting the three wise men in profile, which seemed like the most suitable option. Rite Aid was running a buy-one-get-one-free deal that was only valid if you had one of their wellness cards, so I signed up for one with false information. My new name is, apparently, Rufus Glump.
Aluminum Foil
I never considered aluminum foil as something affected by the whole “you get what you pay for” thing – but it very clearly is. It was 99 cents, which should have tipped me off way before I started using it to wrap Christmas gifts. It was paper-thin, and tore in ways I had no idea aluminum foil could. The end result of my wrapping was haphazard and pretty awful-looking, but I didn’t care. My gift wrapping philosophy is fueled by both frugality and utter laziness. Why spend lots of time and money on something that will be torn up and thrown away? The kind of aluminum foil I buy speaks volumes of my character.
photo courtesy of edkohler.
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