AdviceComedyNewsShopping, Style and Beauty

Oh Great! ‘Hoverboards’ Are Going to be Made Legal on CA Streets

Sign up for the best newsletter EVER!

hover board dork

Sorry Brah, but your ‘hoverboard’ is the fucking worst.  Your mother thought it was ‘pretty neat’, but that girl in your office who you have a crush on,  uses your hoverboard as a punchline in the ladies room.  ‘Hoverboards’, don’t actually hover, they are the Segways for guys who…like Segways.  They are what you turn to when you’ve grown out of your roller shoes.

roller shoes

The founder of Segway Jimi Heselden famously died when he rode one of his Segways off a cliff…news flash, that’s what people are thinking about while you’re hovering next to them on the sidewalk.  They are not thinking about Back to the Future II or your ‘amazing’ core balance, they are thinking, ‘ How does he sleep at night?’

Best Hoverboard Fail Videos…it is hilarious

As of Jan. 1 in California hoverboards can be legally ridden on streets, bike lanes and bike paths, thanks to legislation written by Assembly woman Kristin Olsen, R-Modesto, and signed into law by Gov. Jerry Brown.   Yay.

One of the hottest commodities this Christmas is now facing a serious decline in sales due to safety concerns by big retailers like Amazon, as well as airport security bans due to their potentially combustible battery packs.

Like this article? Make sure to sign up for our mailing list so you never miss a goddamn thing!
Previous post

We Have FREE Tickets to Barry Johnson and Frances Quinlan @ The Chapel!

Next post

We've got your tickets to Creed Bratton from The Office @ The Chapel!

Alex Mak - Managing Editor

Alex Mak - Managing Editor

I'm the managing editor here at Broke-Ass Stuart. I enjoy covering Bay Area News as well as writing about Arts, Culture & Nightlife (not so much nightlife anymore).

If you're a writer, artist, or performer who would like to get your work out there, or if you've got a great product or service to promote, we've got 120k social followers and really fun ways to reach them. We make noise for our partners, and for our community. alex at

1 Comment

  1. Kay O. Sweaver
    December 29, 2015 at 12:05 pm

    A) Whenever I come up on a “hoverboard” on my bike I try to run them out of my lane for the sin of being too slow an uncoordinated.
    B) Every time I see somebody on one, or their evil cousin the motorized skateboard, I dread that we’re going to end up like the humans in Wall-E.