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10 Times Republicans Tried To Take Over a Woman’s Body

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Huckabee is actually means “fuckboy” in Gaelic image from Daily Beast

We all know Republicans think Planned Parenthood is all about abortions and sacrificing goats. We also know they are actually about preventing cancer and women’s health…well, I hope you know that Planned Parenthood is all about women’s health. Here’s 10 times Republicans tried to take over a woman’s body.

1. That time Trump said we should be punished for having an abortion. Last time I checked that was between God and the person who decided to end their pregnancy. Not some misogynistic twat-bag who thinks abortion is “wrong”.

 

Screenshot 2016-04-05 at 6.20.38 PM

 

2. That time Arizona defined the “gestational age of a fetus” and scientifically proved that pregnancy begins before you even conceive.

thefuck

 

3. That time the House voted to freeze federal funding for Planned Parenthood, and every woman in America basically responded exactly the same…

GovernmentSnatch

 

4. That time Rep. Bobby Franklin of Georgia introduced a ten page bill into state legislature stating that “miscarriages” were completely illegal. The bill also proposed women who had a miscarriage be put to death.

BillNye

 

5. That one time Indiana House Bill 1210 was introduced to “force doctors to lie to women about abortion causing breast cancer despite medical evidence to the contrary in order to discourage women from having abortions.”

MeanGirls

 

6. That time those complete assholes at Hobby Lobby decided to file suit and “The U.S. Supreme Court ruled that the owners of closely-held, profit-making corporations cannot be forced under the Affordable Care Act to provide their employees with certain kinds of contraceptives that offend their religious beliefs.”

Courtesy of Truth Revolt

Courtesy of Truth Revolt

7. People realize birth control is used for the treatment of endometriosis, poly-cystic ovarian syndrome, and other female reproductive diseases with little to no research, right??? I guess Republicans don’t get that sort of shit. I had an Aunt who got cancer once and my cousin swore it was because she “Voted for Obama.” I mean, “Hello! Cancer is for those who believe homosexuals are people.”

8. That one time Republican Candidate for U.S. Senate Todd Akin, from Missouri, made that insanely awesome statement that “women who are victims of ‘legitimate rape’ rarely experience pregnancy from rape”. That mother fucker so lost that election. Because, well, you just don’t fuck around with rape statements. Ever. Unless you’re Republican.

 

RepublicanRape

 

9. That time Trump just outright stated he was “waging a war on women” because Megyn Kelly schooled him on national television, so he just blamed it on her period. Even conservative women don’t have tolerance for misogynistic bullshit…

Tolerance

 

10. Then there was that time, oh like yesterday, when Republican Louie Gohmert said,

“Women were created for one thing and one thing alone…it is the job of a woman to stay at home, to maintain the household, to bear children and look after them after they’re born. Nowhere in the scriptures does it say that women should be chasing after fancy titles and knowledge. The only knowledge they need is the one we men allow them to have.”

GoodMorningVietnam

 

Sorry, Gohmert. Those of us who know how to “suck a golf ball through a garden hose” are too busy reading books, kicking ass and taking names to fool around with your tiny mind and penis. We enjoy men who respect and love us for the intelligent, successful, bad-ass women we are!

Everyone knows the war on women is all out of complete jealously, because:

BitchesGetStuffDone

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