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This is What White Privilege Looks Like

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I’ve never been pulled over simply for being White. I have been pulled over for speeding 4 times, but I only got ticketed once. Two of those times happened out of state, and I had weed in the car in states where it’s illegal. My car wasn’t searched despite the obvious lingering smell. Instead the officers laughed, realizing I was just a young girl traveling and living my life. One officer gave me directions to a local hot spring. I was arrested once for being drunk at school when I was 15, I was extremely noncooperative and aggressive, refused to give my name or contact information, and swore at the cops. I was never even put in handcuffs. They thought it was “cute”.

I can shop freely in any business without the fear of an employee following me around the store as if I might steal something, even though in the past I have stolen things. I can walk down the street freely without anyone looking at me as if I’m a scary criminal, even though I have made plenty of terrible mistakes.

When I got a good grade in school, it was always attributed to my skills and abilities, rather than “luck” or accusations of cheating. And sometimes I did just get lucky, and sometimes I did cheat.

I knew I would get into college because my entire education was set up to help me get ahead. I didn’t have to search for scholarships based on racial inequities. I didn’t have to worry if I could make it against all odds, because the odds were always in my favor. When I did get into college, no one attributed it to my race, but congratulated me in my acheivements.

I grew up in mostly nice neighborhoods because despite their income level, my parents were able to get loans to purchase their own home, while rampant redlining practices prevented others from achieving the same thing. My family was offered a slice of the American Dream even though we were mostly poor and uneducated. I was never pushed into a rundown neighborhood with no access to real resources or opportunities. I was never told my only way out was to become a basketball player.

People don’t touch my hair without asking like I’m some sort of zoo animal. I’ve never been repeatedly called a name so heinous that we refer to it by its first letter only. I’ve never been told to “go back to Italy”, the country my ancestors are from.

My whole life I’ve been able to turn on the TV or open a newspaper and see people who look like me widely represented. I got to play with dolls and toys that looked like me. I’ve been given countless role models that look like me, and I’ve seen people who look like me represented in positions of power, in the media and in Hollywood. This led to me developing self-esteem and a confident identity, the reassurance that it’s okay to be me in my own skin, and that people who look like me can succeed, and do succeed daily.

I can go into a supermarket, and the foods from my culture aren’t relegated to one single aisle called “ethnic foods”. I can say whatever I want without people making it a statement about my race. When I am in a social setting, I don’t have to feel the anxiety of being the ONLY person that looks like me, I don’t have to feel the disconnect or alienation that it may cause.

I don’t have to worry that my little brothers will be systematically jailed or killed. I don’t worry they will turn to gangs because they lack any other viable options. I don’t have nightmares about police killing them.

When I meet someone new, I know that I am given a blank slate of neutrality, that they aren’t making tons of assumptions about me based on my skin. When Black people are murdered, I can turn the TV off, I can stop reading the news, I can altogether ignore it if I choose to because I don’t have to go to sleep at night worried it might be me next. I can say race doesn’t matter anymore and let’s just all get along, and a lot of people will agree with me.

I hope you guys are still reading this and not catching your next Pokemon. Because, YES I worked really, really fucking hard for everything in my life, but YES I was also given way more chances and way more opportunities, even though I did nothing to deserve them except be born White.

I refuse to live in a world where my cousins, my friends, my lovers, my colleagues, my neighbors, and my Heroes are NOT given the things I have been given. Exposing, understanding and undoing White Privilege is essential to Black Lives Mattering. ‪#‎ExposeYourself‬

**this post does not discount other types of oppression by gender, sexuality, religion, disability, etc— those discriminations are real too (all oppression matters)–but I believe they are rooted in the system of White Supremacy.

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Neek Carmella

Neek Carmella

I'm in a Love/Hate relationship with words.


  1. Sabbie
    July 13, 2016 at 3:38 pm

    I’d say she also gets a large amount of privilege as an attractive young lady!

  2. Cheshireleo
    July 14, 2016 at 3:26 am

    This was the most pointless article on earth.
    98%!was bragging about her privileges and experiences. 2% was an empty generic statement about racism followed by a hashtag. If I didn’t concede the point, it was because it was really weak. Congratulations for being lucky in school. You obviously needed it.
    ~underwhelmed white female

    • happyperson
      July 14, 2016 at 8:50 am

      Most people I know who read this felt similar to what you are describing. I’m glad we are talking about privilege , but this article was mostly trite stories and humble bragging.

      • nelson3300
        July 14, 2016 at 12:00 pm

        “Privilige” is a made-up concept that serves to divide us into sub-categories so we are easier to guilt into submission. I have no control over how priviliged I am, so hating me for it is no different than hating a black person for being black.

        The left has zero moral consistency.

      • Cheshireleo
        July 14, 2016 at 5:00 pm

        Right but this author posted a selfie, her life story (which was actually boring, maybe that was the point) and we are all supposed to pat her on the back because of her very brief enlightenment at the end? These damn millennials that celebrate their own mediocrity and believe it is excellence. Whoever approved this article to be posted and marketed couldn’t find a better story lol.

  3. July 15, 2016 at 1:34 am

    Great article – and from the clueless whining below, obviously one that hit the mark!

  4. TheTruthIsReal1
    October 13, 2017 at 1:14 pm

    Neek Carmella,

    In a few years, you will probably have children. 17 or 18 years later, your chilpd or children, will decide if they are going to college and which college they would like to attend.
    They’ll fill out the paperwork, go to the admissions office, and take a tour of the college.
    A few weeks later, they get a letter from the admissions office but your child is too nervous to tear the envelope open and view the letter; so you, Neek, do it for them.
    “Hello Jilly Jane Joy Jean Johnson,
    Our University, East Bumblescum State, wants to thank you for applying to our institution of higher learning. However, at this time, we will have to place you on our waiting list. As with most Universities, we have a quota system for racial equality and diversity. I’m afraid that our slots for white students have been filled for the coming calendar year.
    If and when your name comes up on our waiting list, you will be contacted. If you wish to apply to other schools, we will help you in any way possible.
    Thank you for your interest in East Bumblescum State University. Sincerely, Blah, blah, blah,
    Your child is crushed; you are crushed; your husband is crushed! Such is life for the last 40 years, for us “privileged” white people! This actually happened to a very good friend of mine!
    You complain about the plight of the blacks and hispanic’s, but the fact is, the racist and unfair ‘affirmative action’ isn’t applied to anyone but white people! They take our jobs away because of our skin color and give them to other, under qualified, workers! Companies with more than ten employees, are required to enforce affirmative action. So one day, you may take a job with another company. Five years in and your boss calls you into his office. He/she, tells you that due to ‘affirmative action’ laws, changes must be made. So the boss tells you that you are either being demoted or you will be let go! All in the name of ‘affirmative action!’
    Think about this scenario. Your company does decide to fire you. You have no idea where you will go for your next job. You and your husband have two children, both under five years old. The happy home your in, is less than a year old, along with your husband’s truck and your SUV; the house has a hefty mortgage; both vehicles are leases and both of you have large, monthly, payments! Of course, you have two small children who are expensive to raise, along with all the rest of your bill’s; remember, you have to have groceries, gasoline, and credit cards, to add to all of your other bills!
    Now you have no job because of ‘affirmative action!’
    Forty years ago, things were different for white folks and black folks. Things were finally starting to change. Whites, blacks, latinos, etc. we’re starting to understand each other. Then Jimmy Carter, became President and things started going down hill. The Democrats always spread racial disharmony and how bad the Republicans are going to make this country for the lower middle class and the poor. Obama was the worst! Our first muslim president, sowed discord between the races but also religions too! Obama, went to the funeral of the people killed in the church massacre, he even sang! However, when white police officers were killed by the ‘black lives matter’ terrorist group, he made a brief statement and did not go to one of those brave men’s funerals nor did he call or meet, with any of the families!
    When white Supreme Court Justice, Antinon Scalia, died, Obama barely acknowledged his death! ONE of the mist important jurist in the courts history, and Obama ignores it! The dems have sown the seeds of racial discord for years and years! They tell the masses that it’s the Republicans party that divides people and tries to keep them poor; anyone who has half a brain, knows that’s a load of crap! 97 out of the poorest 100 cities in the United States, are controlled by democrats and the dems have been in control of those cities for at least 50 years or more!
    We, the “privileged” white people, can’t open a business, like an immigrant and get ten years without having to pay taxes on that business! Tax free! It must be nice! Then, just before the ten year deadline comes up, they close the business or sell it, open another business and again, no taxes for ten years!
    The blacks, they get breaks on buying houses, cars, businesses, kids education, college, jobs, loans, government jobs, and on and on!
    If you want to know the truth, white people are the only race in the United States, you can legally discriminate against! We can lose jobs, housing, business’s, and our dignity, to every other race! On TV, we are called “crackers,” “honkies,” and “lilies,” just to name a few! Oh yeah, let’s not forget the Jewish people, who Jessie Jackson and AL Sharpton, refer to as, “kikes,” “money grubers,”heebs,” and “Christ Killers,” to give a few derogatory names!
    I’m finished with my rant. If you want to downgrade and try to destroy your own race, go somewhere else and do it!? America means America! We are not Irish Americans, African Americans, German Americans, Australian Americans, Jamaican American, or Japanese American; you are just an American and nothing else! When folks start to understand that, then we will not have any more racial barriers to break through!
    Everyone should be proud of his/her, race! Remember this, what you say and do now may come back to haunt you in a few years! ‘Nuff said. –