Eric Barry - Starving Fartist

13 Mar 2013

Full Disclosure: I Was Raped

I can’t tell if I’m waking up or just going to sleep. My drunken stupor has muffled my senses, each coming in and out of focus in a kaleidoscope of sound and touch. I slowly begin to ascend the tiers of sobriety, and as I do, my senses return. There is sound.

Eric Barry - Starving Fartist 1
28 Feb 2013

Full Disclosure: I Want to Go Down on You

Before I even had much sense of what oral sex was (“it’s when you say naughty things into someone else’s ear,” my fellow 6th grader assured me), I knew that going down on a girl was something very unpleasant, something that smelled like fish (turns out Chicken of the Sea is

Eric Barry - Starving Fartist 3
08 Nov 2021

How to Get $300+ Worth of Free Stuff at Rad Bay Area Restaurants

I am extremely excited to announce the release of The Delicious Card! Delicious cardholders get awesome deals at over 37 delectable Bay Area eateries! Membership is a great way to explore new places, support local businesses, AND support local journalism. And all you gotta do is join the Broke-Ass Stuart Patreon for $10

Broke-Ass Stuart - Editor In Cheap 0
26 Feb 2013

2-for-1 tickets to comedian Chris Fairbanks tonight at Milk

Tonight comedian Chris Fairbanks (Comedy Central, Conan, Jimmy Kimmel Live!) will be performing on the weekly show I run at Milk. I’ve been a huge fan of Chris for years now, so getting the chance to perform with him on stage is incredibly exciting for me. Since I still eat pizza out

Eric Barry - Starving Fartist 0
20 Feb 2013

Full Disclosure: I Drink for the Sex

I drink a lot. Probably too much, but I don’t know where you draw the line when it comes to putting poison in your body, so I’ll just assume it’s in chalk somewhere around your dead body. Coming from a family with a history of addiction, I’m keenly aware of

Eric Barry - Starving Fartist 2
13 Feb 2013

Cheap Dates: Eat Your Heart Out

I hate Valentine’s Day. Sure, I’m a hopeless romantic who usually spends every February 14th alone doing Jell-O shots in my chaise while eating bacon-fried bacon and masturbating to re-runs of Breaking Bad, but I retain the comfort of knowing Internet Girlfriend will never leave nor punch me in the face. The real reason

Eric Barry - Starving Fartist 1
06 Feb 2013

Cheap Dates: Case of Mistaken Identity

People frequently mistake me for being gay. Certainly much more than they mistake me for being a comedian. But despite the fact that I studied theater in college while working at the Gap, living in the co-ops and sucking dick on the side for money, I am neither gay nor bisexual.

Eric Barry - Starving Fartist 0
30 Jan 2013

Cheap Dates: Super Size Me

I’m not the first and certainly won’t be the last person to write about the importance of male penis size, but hey, dick talk be making it rain hella page views up in this server. Plus, in the wake of the recent size scandal at Subway, it seemed as good

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23 Jan 2013

Cheap Dates: Getin’ Kinky Wit It

Last week I was given a tour of the Kink.com (NSFW) studios, housed at the San Francisco Armory. If you’re not familiar with Kink, they’re an online porn production company specializing in BDSM and niche categories. I learn by doing, so you can imagine my disappointment when I found out that the tour wasn’t

Eric Barry - Starving Fartist 2