Sarah M. Smart - Red-Light Special

23 Aug 2011

Tacos in the TL, Tuesdays in August

Although clearly burritos are the most highly evolved form of food, science dictates that they must share a common ancestor with tacos. But you don’t have to schlep down to the Mission to get them on Tuesdays this August: Hit up Jones in the scenester-trash, crack-transaction Tenderloin instead! Really, though,

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22 Aug 2011

Tonight! FREE Live Nude Girls! Well, Not Really…

Did that get your attention? Now that you’re here, this is the real scoop: Writer Sheila McClear is going to talk about her book titled The Last of the Live Nude Girls tonight at The Booksmith. Sorry about the bait and switch. In the book, McClear tells us about her

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21 Aug 2011

The Unemployment Chronicles: Vol. II

Welcome back! It’s been a little over a week since I went insane and quit my job with nothing else lined up, and my unemployment adventure continues. As promised, I’ll let you in on my musings and lessons learned this week: Your friends love you. Folks have come out of

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17 Aug 2011

The Unemployment Chronicles: Vol. I

I have a dirty little secret: I’ve never been unemployed… until now. Today marks the first day in 11 years that I haven’t had a job. My feelings are complicated: freedom, anxiety, denial. But as is my wont, I’ll chronicle my foray into unemployment here for you, because I love

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16 Aug 2011

Hide Ya Kids, Hide Ya Wife, and Let’s Talk about Senior Sex

Everyone else out of the room? It’s just you and me now, right? Okay, what I’m about to say might shock you, so sit down. Here it comes: Old people have sex. Did you just go vomit? Now that you’re back, I would like to tell you that senior sex

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14 Aug 2011

For Us, There Is No Spring, Just FREE Tickets to “Conan the Barbarian”

Hey, broke asses, what is best in life? Contrary to the belief of Conan the Barbarian, it is not to crush your enemies, see them driven before you, and to hear the lamentation of their women. In fact, what is best in life is a FREE ticket giveaway to the

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09 Aug 2011

“Wicked Plants” Are out to Get You

This is the strychnine tree, used by nineteenth-century serial killer Dr. Thomas Neill Cream. Effing scary, right? Despite the many lovely products (cilantro, pumpkins, marijuana, +c.) the flora of the earth provide us, plants are pretty terrifying. From the hemlock that killed Socrates to the white snakeroot that (indirectly) killed

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08 Aug 2011

Tonight! Care about Your Government for Once

I know that voting can seem like a hassle and that keeping up with the news is god-damned depressing. But the San Francisco mayoral election is coming up (November 8 of this year, to be exact), so it’s important for you to start paying attention if you don’t want our city

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