Comedy

09 Oct 2019

Totally Reasonable Excuses to Make for Men Who Leave You on “Read”

by Laurie Riihimaki Alright, let’s get real for a sec. There are a few reasons why we make up excuses for men when they ignore our texts. Firstly, we never want to admit that our dream-fuck is ignoring our texts. Like, even if we know our worth, have our shit

Guest Writer 0
08 Oct 2019

The Ukraine Scandal Explained So Even Trump Supporters Can Understand

by Willem Frankfort Recently, the call for the impeachment of President Donald J. Trump has been echoing through Capitol Hill. Most people I meet are stoked to see that glorified internet troll dethroned in disgrace, but, there is still about 30% of this country that can’t seem to understand all

Guest Writer 0
07 Oct 2019

Federal Judge Orders Trump to Untie Screaming Damsel From Train Tracks

A judge rejected the President’s argument that he was immune from “meddling do-gooders.” Monday, Oct 7 2019 – A federal Judge on Monday rejected a bold argument from President Trump that sitting Presidents are immune from investigations into their “dastardly deeds.”  Now, in addition to allowing the Manhattan District Attorney’s

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27 Sep 2019

Neighbors Install Homicidal Robots, Rusty Bear Traps to Deter Homeless

Inspired by the placement of two dozen boulders along both sides of Clinton Park, a quiet side street in the Mission, residents of nearby Landers Street have banded together to deter the presence of homeless encampments by placing a series of killer robots and rusty bear traps at irregular intervals.

Peter Lawrence Kane 0
19 Sep 2019

Why Are Rich New Yorkers So F***ing Weird?

by Jackson Curtin I’m new to the city. Since moving here, I’ve noticed a new kind of interaction has become a part of my life… It was after work on a weekday. I was walking to the 6 station, and saw a middle-aged man in an expensive suit, trendy haircut,

Guest Writer 0
12 Sep 2019

Voodoo as a Means of Political Resistance

by Willem Frankfort I’ve been an activist for a long time, since my mother led me by the hand to Free Mandela rallies. I’m pretty sure that my first words were probably condemning Ronald Reagan. I marched repeatedly; against two wars, against the one percent with Occupy Wall Street at

Guest Writer 0
20 Aug 2019

Trump Hotel to Open at Burning Man

Great news for luxury festivalgoers this year at Burning Man, the newest, hottest glamping experience on the playa is at Trump Hotel Black Rock City.  With the most exceptional views the playa has to offer, Trump International Burning Man Hotel & Putting Green is a sophisticated, exclusive, immersive experience that

Alex Mak - Managing Editor 0
09 Aug 2019

Do You Know What the Actual Boundaries of The Bay Area Are?

You can’t ‘rep The Bay,’ if you don’t even know what it is. Everyone from The Bay loves to say they’re from “The Bay”. It’s almost a rite of passage. You’re not really from here if you haven’t obnoxiously shamed someone for their lack of ability to recite “Feeling Myself”

Abraham Woodliff - Bay Area Memelord 0