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15 Apr 2024

I Lived “The Devil Wears Prada,” Part Two

Miranda got away with her devilish persona because there was a method to her mania. It takes exactly zero talent to be a dick, and I do not respect unwarranted authority. By Week Four with Ħażin totali, my respect for Massimo was almost gone. I’d heard him berate contractors, clients,

Jake Warren 0
08 Apr 2024

I Lived “The Devil Wears Prada”

We all love The Devil Wears Prada. Few of us get to actually live it. I process the weekly shipments at my bar. Every Thursday we get liquor by the case and boxes full of beer and fruits. I open each case and count every bottle into inventory, restock the

Jake Warren 0
07 Feb 2023

Could a Turkey Style Earthquake Happen in California?

Turkey’s tectonic predicament, responsible for the massive quake that struck Kahramanmaras at 4:17 Monday morning, looks awfully familiar.  The tectonic situation in Turkey nearly mirrors California’s. Similar mechanics are at work here. Our dominant faults shove landmasses past one another in opposing directions, much like theirs. The major difference is,

Jake Warren 0
01 Feb 2023

Why The Gays Love M3GAN

10 min read. This article contains spoilers (duh). M3GAN, a.k.a. Model 3 Generative Android, has rocketed straight to the top of gay iconography. It’s not like the movie’s marketing team targeted us directly. As such, the movie’s success doesn’t hinge on queer approval. M3GAN’s got it nonetheless, but how did

Jake Warren 0
24 Jan 2023

What are Those Boxes Under MUNI Seats For?

Ever wonder why there’s a metal box in the way when you try to tuck your feet under your seat? It’s the one beneath those side-facing, longitudinal seats. There’s a window on the front-right panel, a gauge to assess the volume of its content from outside. When I find myself

Jake Warren 0
17 Jan 2023

SF Woman’s Death Highlights Dangers of Eucalyptus

An accident at Golden Gate Park this past Saturday resulted in the tragic death of one San Francisco senior resident. A tree branch suddenly detached from its trunk and struck the elderly passerby below, fatally wounding her. At around 5:15 PM, a passing runner discovered the fallen woman on JFK

Jake Warren 0
03 Jan 2023

Clear Lake Volcano More Active Than Previously Thought

In June I wrote about the threat to San Francisco posed by Mount Konocti, specifically the Clear Lake Volcanic Field. People seem to have forgotten the volcano, I lamented. Our earthquakes, landslides, and wildfires tend to overshadow California’s windows to the furnace churning beneath our feet. Scientists previously estimated the

Jake Warren 0
20 Dec 2022

Why Did(n’t) MyShake Warn Me?

The noise woke my partner first. I heard it distantly, still ascending from the depths of a REM cycle. Its robotic voice, preceded by a red-alert siren, warned of impending shaking. Knowing that it’s safest to stay in bed if an earthquake strikes at night, we looked at each other

Jake Warren 0