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BA of the Week: Jesse Cafiero from Split Screens

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Every week we feature a different person from the community shedding a little light on their life of brokeitude. Who knows, maybe you’ll learn something about the human spirit — probably not.

Wanna be a Broke-Ass of the Week? Holler at us here and we’ll send you the questionnaire.


Jesse is the singer/songwriter/multi instrumentalist for the band Split Screens. Split Screens just had a show at Bottom of the Hill and I was supposed to post this Broke-Ass of the Week last week to help promote it, but I dropped the ball. I do that sometimes. Fuck it.

That said, the band also has a brand new single out called “The Sinner”. Check it out right here, then check out Jesse’s answers to our grueling questions. His answer about where he lives is hilarious.

Name: Jesse Cafiero

Age: 30

Occupation: Musician and aspiring collage artist

What neighborhood do you live in?: My new place is in-between neighborhoods but judging by the weekly “Power Bottom-Less” mimosa fliers I’ve been getting on my car I’m gonna have to go with the Castro.

Best money saving tip: Cut down on having to go to bar ATM’s for cash, those fees add up!

What do you refuse to spend money on?: New furniture, the prices just blow my mind.

Most expensive thing you’ve ever bought: That would have to be my car, had to get a station wagon so I could throw my upright bass in the back for gigs, soccer mom for life!

How’d that feel?: Eh…not so great, but having a car can be pretty liberating and it’s nice to drive out of the city whenever you want.

Favorite cheap eat: Chicken Banh Mi at Eternal Springs on 9th ave and Clement in SF. My first vietnamese sandwich ever and still the best!

Favorite dive bar: I think it’s a small step above a true dive but Zam Zam in the Haight has a special place in my heart. I love how that place has looked the same for the last 70 years and that oval bar can’t be beat!

Best deal you’ve ever gotten: I don’t think of it as exactly a “deal”, but when I was 25 before I moved to San Francisco I travelled around western Europe solo for a month using It was an amazing experience being a guest in so many cool peoples’ homes and I easily saved hundreds of dollars in the process.

Favorite free thing to do: I love to walk around the city with headphones, it clears my mind like few things do. If you woke up a millionaire, what’s the first thing you’d buy? A beach house.

Despite not having money, do you still love your life?: Well, I have the opportunity to live in one of the most unique cities in the world and my apartment has been on rent control for at least the past 5 years so…I don’t see any reason to complain.

Do you own my book?: I don’t but I have seen it at a friends house and got a chance to skim through. It was good timing since I had just moved to SF, I loved it!

Best hangover cure: Fruit punch Gatorade

Are you a hipster?: Visually, not so much. But I do play in an indie band whose name is an homage to the 1970’s split screen film technique that director Brian De Palma used in “Carrie” and “Sisters.” So just from that I think I qualify!

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Broke-Ass Stuart - Editor In Cheap

Broke-Ass Stuart - Editor In Cheap

Stuart Schuffman, aka Broke-Ass Stuart, is a travel writer, poet, TV host, activist, and general shit-stirrer. His website is one of the most influential arts & culture sites in the San Francisco Bay Area and his freelance writing has been featured in Lonely Planet, Conde Nast Traveler, The Bold Italic, and too many other outlets to remember. His weekly column, Broke-Ass City, appears every other Thursday in the San Francisco Examiner. Stuart’s writing has been translated into four languages. In 2011 Stuart created and hosted the travel show Young, Broke, and Beautiful on IFC and in 2015 he ran for Mayor of San Francisco and got nearly 20k votes.

He's been called "an Underground legend": SF Chronicle, "an SF cult hero":SF Bay Guardian, and "the chief of cheap": Time Out New York.

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