funny

01 Apr 2020

The First Day of Quarantine Was Amazing…Now What?

Short story by Moss Brixton “Hey.” “Hey.” My roommate and I eye each other with squints, like the guys in movies who have mustaches and one of them pulls out his pistol a fraction of a split second before the other and poof, one is dead before the other stomps

Guest Writer 0
31 Oct 2019

Movember or Not, My Mustache Is Here to Stay

Not everyone grows a mustache specifically for Movember. A septuagenarian neighbor of mine recently sprouted one resembling Clark Gable’s tasteful, unobtrusive horizontal strip. When another friend of ours asked why, at this late stage in life, he decided to grow one, he replied, “I’ve been trying for about 10 years

Geri Koeppel 0
05 Oct 2020

The November 2020 BAS Voter Guide

Primarily researched and written by Stephen Torres with help from Stuart Schuffman. We stand at the precipice of one of the most polarizing federal elections that has ever occurred in this country. Each day brings another dash of chaos, and yet here we are, once again sifting through another labyrinthine

BAS Editorial Team 5
04 Oct 2019

What These Couples Costumes Say About Your Relationship

by Kate Brunotts If your partner has brought up matching costumes this year, you’re in it deep. Halloween is one of the best times of year on its own, not to mention another shining opportunity to show off to the world that you’re not going to die alone.  Before you

Guest Writer 0
26 Sep 2018

The Time I Hilariously Almost Went To Jail For Weed

Back when I was 19, I moved out of my parents house and in with my girlfriend & her slutty (her words, not mine…she loved the hell out of sex) roommate. We were all young and stupid, we threw parties all the time…did young people shit. Also we tricked the slutty

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29 Jul 2018

Facebook Lost $123 Billion Overnight…and a Bag Of Skittles Just Overdrew Me

Unless you’ve been living in captivity in the glaciers of Antarctica for the last decade or so, you have a Facebook account. Hell, I’ll be sharing this very article on Facebook within 24 hours, I’m sure. You probably also know that it is one of the richest companies on the

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02 Mar 2018

When a Work Email Chain Goes Very Very Wrong

by Devin Holt Editor’s note: Most stories are made out of paragraphs that lead to the next paragraph. This fictional account of an email thread gone very, very wrong uses a slightly different format.                                

Fiction 0
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30 May 2013

2nd Annual New York Funny Songs Festival Takeover

The 2nd Annual New York Funny Songs Festival will be emitting hilarity throughout various venues across New York City this weekend including Santo’s Party House, Joe’s Pub, The Living Room and much more! With funny lady Jessica Delfino at the helm, the festival was able to raise enough money through

Enrique Grijalva - Mr. Minimum Wage 0
26 Feb 2013

2-for-1 tickets to comedian Chris Fairbanks tonight at Milk

Tonight comedian Chris Fairbanks (Comedy Central, Conan, Jimmy Kimmel Live!) will be performing on the weekly show I run at Milk. I’ve been a huge fan of Chris for years now, so getting the chance to perform with him on stage is incredibly exciting for me. Since I still eat pizza out

Eric Barry - Starving Fartist 0