Ted Cruz

18 Feb 2021

While Millions of Texans Freeze, Ted Cruz Goes on Cancun Vacation

As 3 million Texans shivered in the dark, with no heat or clean water during the state’s worst freeze and power outage in history, their Senator Ted Cruz took off to Cancun with his family.  People who saw him at the airport and on their plane couldn’t believe it.

Alex Mak - Managing Editor 0
06 Jan 2021

How To Watch The Republicans Fall On Their Face In A Failed Coup Attempt, Live Online

Republicans are challenging the results of the election in a joint session of Congress right now, and they will fail spectacularly. You can watch them fail spectacularly in the livestream of the Electoral College vote count below. The C-Span Youtube channel will be broadcasting Congress’ certification of Joe Biden’s victory,

Joe Kukura- Millionaire in Training 0
27 Jan 2024

The San Francisco Beer Passport is Here!

Step into a world of adventure with the San Francisco Beer Passport. There’s no better way to explore San Francisco than to literally drink it in. This passport is amazing! Each one contains 27 coupons to buy one beer, get a second beer FREE at 27 of the finest locally

Broke-Ass Stuart - Editor In Cheap 0
09 Sep 2020

Boooo! ‘The Princess Bride’ Cast Reunites to Kick Trumperdinck Out of Office

“The Princess Bride” is that movie that works every time you need a lift, like comfort food for weary souls in inconceivable times. So, in this hellscape we call 2020, what could be more nourishing than a cast reunion reading? How about a reunion used as a fundraiser for Wisconsin

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14 Jul 2020

Ted Cruz Gets Busted For Refusing To Wear Mask On Flight

Republican senator and closeted porn fiend Ted Cruz was spotted Sunday completely breaking the rules on an American Airlines flight, not wearing a mask despite the airline’s strict face covering requirement. The incident was photographed and posted on Twitter, drawing defensive denials from Cruz’ spokespeople and a stern warning from

Joe Kukura- Millionaire in Training 0
27 Jan 2019

Ted Cruz Talks to MAGA Teen About Living with ‘Punchable Face Syndrome’

“I’m a survivor, you’re a survivor, God knows it wasn’t easy”.  Ted Cruz on living with PFS (Punchable Face Syndrome). Senator Ted Cruz of Texas reached out to the embattled MAGA hat wearing teenager Nick Sandmann Sunday to speak with him about the dangers of living with PFS, commonly known as ‘Punchable Face

Alex Mak - Managing Editor 0
12 Sep 2017

Porn Site Gets Thousands Of New Followers Thanks To Ted Cruz Screw-Up

  The late-night porn-jacking habits of anti-pornography GOP senator Ted Cruz have entered the national conversation, as the pompous “family values” bullshit-spewing rube clicked ‘Like’ on a pornographic tweet and breathed beautiful life into late-night Twitter like it was “covfefe” all over again. He also breathed life into the pornographic Twitter

Joe Kukura- Millionaire in Training 0
10 Jun 2016

Hillary Gets the Nomination, But Bernie Won, Too

It seems like Hillary has sewn up the nomination, but in a lot of ways, Bernie also won. Anything could happen, in this strange election cycle, but it appears that—barring unforeseen circumstances—Hillary Clinton will be the first female president of the United States. It’s about time we had a woman

P Segal - Bohemian Archivist 0
03 May 2016

10 Times Ted Cruz Looked Like He Just Sharted

Ted Cruz is a perfect example of what’s wrong with America. Why is Ted Cruz awful? Well here are some reasons, and here are some reasons, and here are some more reasons. It appears he’s always been awful though since his college roommate still hates him. The one thing I

Broke-Ass Stuart - Editor In Cheap 0