It’s a Rubber Chicken Delivery Service, Yeah That’s What I Said
Here at brokeassstuart.com we get a lot of press requests for things like events, music, political candidates, products, sex, fights, sex-fights, protests, tattoos, guides, art, dates with Stuart, ‘SEO do-follow link additions’ from Bangalore, and the list goes on and on. We certainly don’t have time to cover all of them. But every now and again you get a doozy. This one is from a local artisan whose mail order rubber chicken business is ostensibly hilarious. Meet Melody (known as the chicken lady at her local post office), she’s a new face to San Francisco, and exactly the kind of transplant we at Broke-Ass Stuart like, and by that we mean she’s artistic, funny, and kinda weird.
Melody: “Hi Alex, a few months ago, I carried a rubber chicken around with me and realized how much joy and confusion it brought to everyone around me. Then I discovered that I can mail the chickens without packaging, so I created a service out of it– it’s at carrierchicken.com”
Not only does Melody send whoever you want a rubber chicken, she will craft hand written messages on or in the chicken, as well as include plenty of chicken related puns on request. For example:
We asked Melody a few questions about her carrier chickens, enjoy…
What are your favorite chicken puns so far?
Name-wise, I was pretty pleased with:
Eggleanor Roostevelt and Theggodore Roostevelt
Fowlst
Prince Eggward
Henchick Lamar or Kendregg Lamar
The newsletter welcome email thanks people for becoming a squawkscriber, hopes that they’re as eggcited as we are about sending out their first Carrier Chicken, and is signed “Peep and cluck.” When I brought the chicken around town with me, I “took it under my wing” and while some people thought I was “cuckoo,” others assumed I was “peacocking.” I also enjoyed referring to UC Berkeley as UC Bawkley.
What’s the best message you’ve stuffed up a chicken’s butt lately?
A girl sent a chicken to her boyfriend at work and wrote the following:
“Hi, I’m here to interview for the Full-Stack Eggineer position at Cheep Analytics!”
Another guy sent his friend this message:
“Well well well… bet you didn’t expect this! Happy Birthday bud! Wishing you thee best, you mother clucker!!!”
And this one:
¯\_(ツ)_/¯
How long have you been in SF?
Since December 2016 (originally from San Jose) I started taking improv classes after moving here and it’s sort of how the idea took flight
What do you do for a day job?
I’m a map designer!
If someone was going to use this to make thanksgiving invitations or Christmas cards, what should they expect pun-wise?
Thanksgiving
Hey peep, don’t coop yourself up this thanksgiving. count your blessings (before they hatch!) and fly on over to celeggbrate with us! there’s no need to eat like a bird; come feast on our eggcessively large turkey, as no one leaves this house feeling peckish, no eggceptions!
Christmas
Don’t get your feathers ruffled, but we think you’ve been a bad egg all year because you’ve been working around the cluck and haven’t come to visit us. you’re still part of the flock, though, and we’d be eggceptionally chirpy if you sip eggnog and sing some christmas carols with us. please chick your calendar and stop by—we’re only a hoot and a holler away, and we’re super eggcited to see you!
Can Broke-Ass readers get a special hook-up on chicken mailings?
For sure! Broke-ass stuart readers can use the promo code ‘BROKEASS‘ and get 20% off all their chickens!