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Thizz Faced & Gold Blooded: Let’s Go Dubs!

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It’s gameday folks and lucky for the Bay Area game 1 of the NBA finals falls on a Thursday. We love nothing more than to treat a Thursday like a Friday or a Sunday evening for us industry food and drink slingers. So slap on your sportsball pants, get your thizz face and 3 fingers in the air ready and strap in. We are in for a series.

The Boston Celtics are basically the Yankees of the NBA when it comes to hanging championship banners. Hell, Oakland native and arguably one of the best to ever strap on a pair of Chuck Taylors, Bill Russell won 11 titles in the 13 years he spent in Boston. One of those coming in 1964 against the then San Francisco Warriors led by none other than Wilt “The Stilt” Chamberlain. Can you imagine championship finals basketball being played at the Cow Palace in Daly City, because that definitely happened. This series is special and the one I wanted all season. This isn’t the Cleveland Cavaliers or the Toronto Raptors. This is the famed Boston Celtics!

This will be no easy task as the young duo of Jayson Tatum and Jaylen Brown bring with them the NBA defensive player of the year in Marcus Smart. The Celtics rank first in most defensive categories and ballhawk like none other. The Warriors are no softies when it comes to D’ing up opponents either ranking right behind the Celtics overall. The Warriors Andrew Wiggins will once again be key when it comes to locking down the Celtics young wings along with Kevon Looney doing his best Dennis Rodman impression ripping down rebounds.

Speaking of defense, good news is on the way. Gary Payton II, Andre Igudala and Otto Porter Jr are all back to practicing for the Warriors with Porter Jr more than likely being the only one ready for game 1 tonight. At this point of the year everyone is a little banged up and this is where that championship experience will give the Warriors the mental advantage over the much younger and inexperienced core of the Celtics. Oh and did I mention coach Kerr coached Tatum, Brown and Smart during the World Cup of Basketball for team USA. That’s some helpful insight.

While the talking heads of the sports media world will settle for nothing less than a finals MVP to “solidify” Curry’s legacy, all that matters to this squad is championships. This is an egoless team led by a core of three time champions who are appearing in their 6th out of the past 8 NBA Finals. The keys to victory will be keeping the Celtics busy on the defensive end of the ball chasing around the likes of Curry, Thompson and Poole. Turnovers, turnovers, turnovers, the Warriors must protect the basketball. The Caesars sportsbook has the Warriors as -155 favorites meaning it would take $155 bet to net $100 back for you degenerates. Get your beers ready and let’s have a go Beantown. I’ll see you at Columbus Cafe in North Beach, Gold Blooded!

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JC Carlston

JC Carlston

JC is a freelance writer of untypical nonsense and former co-owner and founder of Lower Branch (art blog/nomadic curating group) and the Lower Branch Gallery in San Francisco's Tenderloin district. A sports nerd with an appetite for all things art and absurd. He can easily be found bopping around all corners of the city with a beer and burrito in hand, keep an eye out and say hello.

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