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The Top 10 Floatie Trends at Northern Nights

Updated: Jul 25, 2022 16:04
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We’ve all been waiting 2 years for festival season to return, some more patiently than others. Northern Nights Music Festival 2022 marks my return to the festival circuit. Based on the floaties I witnessed at this years event, festival goers have returned with vengeance! After two years of not floating on the Eel River music enthusiast accessorized like they had something to prove. While some might say neon, crochet, or bucket hats are the trend for 2022, I’m here to say it’s rubber, either butyl or latex for me!

1. YOU CAN’T DEFINE MY FLOATIE

For fear that others would try to label or define this floatie it’s partner tattooed its rubber surface to clarify exactly what it was. Clearly this is a “Slow Sloth Sex.” But don’t you still wonder … who came up with this floatie idea and where can I get one?

2. YES THAT’S A PENIS FLOATIE

When your friend walks up to you and says is that a floatie or are you just happy to see me. Also, sometimes it’s best to just lead with your best feature, your floatie. Perhaps that the floatie you thought you were going to bring to the festival but it’s the one you’ve got.

3. EVEN MY ACTION FIGURE HAS A FLOATIE

It’s not a doll, it’s an action figure, and yes, he has his own floatie. You can’t expect this festival goer to share his floatie with his doll, I mean action figure. Obviously this action figure is his own man and wants his own things. #Independent

4. BEWARE OF FLOATIE

Not all floaties are friendly. In the case of this dinosaur floatie you might want to let it sniff your hand first? Ask the owner if it is ok to say hi. Approach slowly and never break eye contact.

5. I’M HERE WITH MY FLOATIE FRIENDS

Now more than ever before floaties and their partners are grouping together and spending time in tight circles. New relationships are exhausting and it’s time to get some cuddle time in with your close homies.

6. THE AMAZON FLOATIE FAIL

This amazon order arrived 12 hours before leaving for Northern Nights Music Festival. The price had recently dropped by 40% which felt like an amazing deal for a Gold Sloth. The rubber had new floatie smell and the packaging was nicely sealed. Everything seemed positive until air was added and the floatie deflated almost instantly. This floatie is getting returned the second it returns to San Francisco.

7. REMEMBERED EVERYTHING EXCEPT FLOATIE

You brought an umbrella, packed your bag with goodies, and ordered a drink from the bar. Everything felt positive until you realized you didn’t bring a floatie. However, this year at Northern Nights her savior came from Monster who was handing out energy drinks and tiny round tubes.

8. SOME FLOATIES PREFER THE SHORE

I heard this floatie owner talking to a friend, “I’m just here to see and be seen.” Swimming is not for some people and some floaties just look better when posted up with drinks on the shore.

9. KNOW THEY FLOATIE SELF

As tattoos become common place, more floaties are starting to match the body modifications of their owners. This might be similar to dogs that look like their canine parents. It’s reassuring to me to know some people are still comfortable being ducks (or swans) while others are more of the patterned flamingo types.

10. DUDE DIDN’T GET THE FLOATIE MEMO

Paddle boards are still trendy, but they aren’t the trend of Northern Nights. I felt so embarrassed for him and his huge board, all alone, amongst a bunch of rubber, either butyl or latex. The good news is he’ll know better in 2023 and bring a floatie that matches the vibe better.

On another note, some might also know that Northern Nights had a cutting-edge music line-up. Additionally, they featured industry-leading cannabis programming which brought in award-winning growers from across California. On July 15th-17th there were thousands of music fans at Cook’s Valley Campground in Piercy, CA enjoying electronic music innovators Claude VonStroke, TroyBoi, CloZee, Elderbrook, Two Feet,  SNBRN, and Of The Trees. Other highlights included Wreckno, ford, Smoakland, Modern Biology, Equanimous, and Subsuelo. Additionally, muralists Blake Reagan, Dmise, Eon75, and more shared their work at NNMF.  Band photos by Kristina Islas

Claude Vonstroke • Troyboi • Clozee • Elderbrook • Two Feet Snbrn • Of The Trees • Balkan Bump • David Starfire • Equanimous • Ford. • J. Worra • Khushi Modern Biology • Orion • Smoakland Soohan • Westend • Wreckno • Akriza • Am Prs&Nd • Atzios • Anthny.jacobs • Bakr • Boiz House • C3lo • Cassidy Blaze Chocolate Sushi • Chopsjunkie • Copperton, Deejay Juan G • Deejay Theory • Derek Watts • Dials Discopill • Dj Joe-E • Dj Stefan Aronsen • Drmwvr • Dualocoded • El Cool J • Esch Frankie Di Franco & Friends • Free Creatures • Hippy Trap • Isotope • Jimmy Hits • Jsun Paul • Kayatta Kwovadus • Kyra Joseph • Lacy Redhead • Little John • Maia • Marjo Lak • Malarkey • Meduso Michael Milano • Naiad • Nem X Vvyld • Object Heavy • Papa Lu • Pruminati • Riffa • Ryan Navaroli Simon Surreal • Squidcat • Sr Themvemnt • Stan Jericho • Subsuelo • Suds • Tecni • The Middle Agent Touch • Treemeista • Tropical! Crew • Whitenoize • Whitlock • Wyram • Zack Darling • Zera • Rcml Uirticia Muiiali. A Blake Reagan • Cvltiv8r • Dmise Max Ehrman Eon75 • Felicia Gabaldon • Katie Rose Rainbowmaker Knok • Musashi Thoth • Pengoo & Marc Wagenseil • Pyramid Guy

SOCIAL LINKS

NORTHERNNIGHTS.ORG • INSTAGRAM • FACEBOOK • YOUTUBE • TWITTER

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Stefan Aronsen

Stefan Aronsen

I am the co-founder of Balanced Breakfast, a meetup for music industry professionals. No, I do not sing or play any instruments ... but I have tried! My passion for music began at 7 when my parents bought me a drum set. I was BAD at drums. So I moved on, joined the school band, and played clarinet. I was BAD at the clarinet. Trying and failing at instruments continued through elementary school and into college. It turns out that while I could recognize good music; I lacked the skill to make it.

Now I'm broke, beautiful, and writing about music for Stuart...

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