San Francisco is either going through a renaissance or is on the verge of violent revolution depending on who you talk to or what neighborhood you’re in.
A bar in the Mission District may have you standing shoulder-to-shoulder with people who call you comrade unironically while a bar in the Marina District may subject you to the hip hop prowess of an Em-CEO who should probably stick to the boardroom and steer clear of the vocal booth for the good of us all.
The last thing we need is artificial intelligence bars rapped by the organically stupid.
But it doesn’t matter which side of San Francisco’s bar scene you subscribe to, December 15th was a weirdly bad day for the city.
The first strangely terrifying event was when one of San Francisco’s iconic cable cars came to an abrupt stop at around 3:30pm, leaving fourteen people injured, eleven of which were rushed to the hospital.
The chaotic cable car scene was quickly outdone when a Shell gas station on the corner of 16th and Guerrero decided to fucking explode roughly an hour after the impromptu brake check.
SFFD arrived at a massive fiery hole in the ground that sort of resembled an “emergence hole” from the popular video games series Gears of War, and immediately worked to close off the street and put out the fire. In what could be legitimately qualified as a miracle, there doesn’t appear to be any reported injuries in connection with the explosion.
However, it didn’t seem to stop people from trying to add to the fire’s non-existent casualty count. San Francisco resident and fellow BAS shitposter, Bunny McFadden, reported that locals rushed to the scene of the explosion in an attempt to capture close-up footage of the blast, which, if another explosion occurred, could’ve seriously injured, if not killed the clout thirsty crowd.
Anything for ‘the gram,’ I guess.
There’s always a silver lining, and the silver lining in these two completely unrelated freak accidents that took place an hour apart just a few miles away from each other is that no one died.
And for that, we have to give credit where credit’s due: Thank you, Daniel Lurie. Because he’s going to try and take credit somehow anyway.
We’re so back, San Francisco. We’re so fuckin’ back.
