FREE Admission to Aquarium of the Bay TODAY!

You can touch this guy! For free! No herps!

You know how you live in a city for a long time, but never do the super touristy things in that city?  For example, I’ve never done the double-decker hop-on, hop-off bus tour, been across the water to Alcatraz, or had sex with a hooker-tranny in the ‘Loin.

But today is awesome because one thing I’ve always wanted to do in San Francisco, but refuse to pay for, is visit the Aquarium of the Bay.  Normally, it’s $16.95 for an adult admission ticket (which is, admittedly, waaaaay cheaper than admission to the Aquarium at Monterey Bay or Sea World, but still too rich for my blood).  Today, for the first 3,500 visitors, admission is completely FREE.  I don’t know how many people normally visit the aquarium daily, but I think I’ll be going early just to ensure that I can pet the starfish at my own leisure and without paying.

This promotion, btw, is courtesy of Bausch & Lomb to promote their new contact lens solution, “biotrue.”  I don’t have to worry about that shit anymore since I had Lasik two years ago (best decision of my life, for you people on the fence), but I’m into it because B&L (who own Ray-Ban) also make (made?) awesome sunglasses, like these babies that my friend owns.  Secretly I think they’re hot, but outwardly I scoff at his “hipster aesthetic” and tell him he can’t come to the aquarium with me for free unless he leaves them at home.