AdviceArts and CultureBoozeBroke-Ass of the WeekEatsNew YorkSan FranciscoSlider

Broke-Ass of the Week: The Bitchy Waiter

The Bay's best newsletter for underground events & news

Every week we feature a different person from the community shedding a little light on their life of brokeitude. Who knows, maybe you’ll learn something about the human spirit — probably not.

Wanna be a Broke-Ass of the Week? Holler at us here and we’ll send you the questionnaire.

I’m very excited to have The Bitchy Waiter as our Broke-Ass of the Week this time around. The Bitchy Waiter is a hero for anyone who has ever been in the service industry because he’s our voice, not of reason, but of “I’m sick of this shit and I’m gonna let you know why.” When asked about himself he said:

I have been in the food service industry pretty consistently since 1985 when I got my first job as a dishwasher at a Sirloin Stockade in Victoria, Texas. I started in 2008 and it has given me so much more than I ever dreamed. The blog began as a way for me to vent about annoying customers and it was just for my friends. Five years later, it has put me on CBS Sunday Morning, the Today Show, Dr. Phil and in countless magazines and news articles. The funny thing is that I have made blogging about waiting tables such a part of my life, that I have to keep waiting tables so I have something to blog about. Oh, the irony!

In addition to writing the blog and running the Bitchy Waiter Facebook Page, I have been working on my live show, The Bitchy Waiter Show which has had two sold out performances in New York City. The next one is on September 6th at the iconic cabaret venue, Don’t Tell Mama.

How fucking superb is that? Make sure to find him on Twitter and join his epic Facebook following and of course read his answers below:
Name: The Bitchy Waiter

Age: 47

Occupation: Waiter

What neighborhood do you live in: Sunnyside, Queens

Best money saving tip: I have two accounts, a checking and a savings. I made a rule that once it goes into savings it can NOT come out. Also, I take 5% of my daily tips and put them in an envelope to deposit at the end of the month.

What do you refuse to spend money on?: Water in a restaurant. No way. Just bring me the tap.

Most expensive thing you’ve ever bought: The apartment I bought with my husband ten years ago.

How’d that feel?: It was the best financial move I have ever made. We bought in a really affordable (read: not cool) neighborhood and we have been lucky that the neighborhood has moved up in coolness by about 1/10 of one percent since we bought it. It is our retirement plan. Worst case scenario is we sell it and move to some part of the country that isn’t as expensive as New York City.

Favorite cheap eat: I can eat a piece of pizza from practically anywhere and be immensely satisfied with it. Even bad pizza is good pizza to me.

Favorite dive bar: I don’t like dive bars. Even though I hate spending one dime on water at a restaurant, I seem to have no problem spending $15 on a cocktail. Yerba Buena on Perry Street in NYC is my fave (non-dive) bar.

Best deal you’ve ever gotten: I went to a restaurant in Boston recently and when someone realized I was The Bitchy Waiter, suddenly the bartender made me a free drink and two waitresses told me they had ordered me two special appetizers.

Favorite free thing to do: I love to go to Central Park and sit in Sheeps Meadow with a sandwich I brought from home.

If you woke up a millionaire, what’s the first thing you’d buy?: A two-week beach vacation so I could sit and drink cocktails all day while planning out the rest of my fabulously wealthy life.

Despite not having money, do you still love your life?: I pretty much do. I feel lucky to be married to someone I have been with for 23 years. I bitch about my job a lot, but the reality is that the blogging is so much fun that it makes the job tolerable.

Do you own my book?: Ummm, is it free?

Best hangover cure: After a lot of drinking, I take two aspirin and eat a banana before I go to bed.

Are you a hipster?: I’m too old to be a hipster. In three years, I get my AARP card at which point I will be more concerned with a broken hip(ster).

Like this article? Make sure to sign up for our mailing list so you never miss a goddamn thing!
Previous post

Why Bernal is the New Mission

Next post

Organ Grind: A South American Food Journal Part 11, Buenos Aires is Red Meat + Red Wine in Large Plastic Bottles

Broke-Ass Stuart - Editor In Cheap

Broke-Ass Stuart - Editor In Cheap

Stuart Schuffman, aka Broke-Ass Stuart, is a travel writer, poet, TV host, activist, and general shit-stirrer. His website is one of the most influential arts & culture sites in the San Francisco Bay Area and his freelance writing has been featured in Lonely Planet, Conde Nast Traveler, The Bold Italic, and too many other outlets to remember. His weekly column, Broke-Ass City, appears every other Thursday in the San Francisco Examiner. Stuart’s writing has been translated into four languages. In 2011 Stuart created and hosted the travel show Young, Broke, and Beautiful on IFC and in 2015 he ran for Mayor of San Francisco and got nearly 20k votes.

He's been called "an Underground legend": SF Chronicle, "an SF cult hero":SF Bay Guardian, and "the chief of cheap": Time Out New York.

No Comment

Leave a reply

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *