Underpasses don’t generally lend themselves to good, wholesome fun. I, for one, experienced in a Dolores Park underpass an “Egyptian baptism” by a man wearing a gold turban and claiming to be King Tut in a previous life. He sprinkled me with bottles labeled “opium,” “sunlight,” and “holy water” that he carried

This is the strychnine tree, used by nineteenth-century serial killer Dr. Thomas Neill Cream. Effing scary, right? Despite the many lovely products (cilantro, pumpkins, marijuana, +c.) the flora of the earth provide us, plants are pretty terrifying. From the hemlock that killed Socrates to the white snakeroot that (indirectly) killed

For some reason, being smart and cultured is considered sexy. Whether you actually are these things doesn’t really matter as long as you pretend to be, or at least pretend to want to be. And that’s where museum free days come in. Pretty much all of the best museums in

* and the rest of you too. Although on second thought, that sounds like a STD testing ad. Uh. Well, I got your attention, didn’t I? On to the boring part, Tuesday, Oct. 5th is the first Tuesday of the month which means FREE museum day to more museums than

Yeah, I know I’m just pasting in a press release, but I’m crazy busy today.  Plus I wanna get out and enjoy some of this good weather.  Also the good thing about this event is that you can go and then still come to my party afterwards.  So fuck it,

It’s gonna be like 71 degrees today in San Francisco, so why not go some place other than Dolores Park for a change? Golden Gate Park is 1,017 acres of a good time; in fact it is 174 acres more of a good time than Central Park in New York.