Does Batman Perform Oral? The Debate Is Going Down On Twitter

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Image: Warner Bros.

Nothing prepared me for logging on to Twitter today and seeing the platform dripping with a heated discussion on whether Batman performs oral sex. Where did this come from? Perplexed, the Broke-Ass Stuart I-Team tried to put our finger on why people would be arguing over whether or not Batman goes downtown.

This curious argument tunnels out of an interview published this morning in Variety magazine with the creators of an animated series called Harley Quinn, which apparently played on a streaming service called DC Universe Infinite, and will be switching to HBO Max for Season 3. (HBO Max already has the first two seasons up.) The writers wanted to create a different kind of DC Universe, so they were really thinking outside of the box.

“In this third season of Harley, we had a moment where Batman was going down on Catwoman,” executive producer Patrick Schumacker told Variety.  “And DC was like, ‘You can’t do that. You absolutely cannot do that.’ They’re like, ‘Heroes don’t do that.’ So, we said, ‘Are you saying heroes are just selfish lovers?’ They were like, ‘No, it’s that we sell consumer toys for heroes. It’s hard to sell a toy if Batman is also going down on someone.’”

Maybe they’re just selling the wrong kind of toys?

Batman has always been a cunning hero, and it seems like the higher-ups at DC Comics just weren’t very coozie with the idea of Batman performing oral. So this should not be seen as a canonical decision that Batman does not eat pussy. We have to consider that the DC Comics franchise is currently owned by Warner Bros., which is itself owned by AT&T.  And those executives are not exactly chomping at the bit to see Batman perform oral sex on Catwoman.

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Joe Kukura- Millionaire in Training

Joe Kukura- Millionaire in Training

Joe Kukura is a two-bit marketing writer who excels at the homoerotic double-entendre. He is training to run a full marathon completely drunk and high, and his work has appeared in the New York Times and Wall Street Journal on days when their editors made particularly curious decisions.