Eat & Drink

Stop Leaving 1-Star Reviews For Stupid Reasons

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Can we all collectively agree that most people who give 1-star reviews to a restaurant are a waste of precious human skin? In these days of keyboard warriors, people feel entitled to type out their frustrations in the form of a bad review the second something goes wrong at a restaurant.

Far too often, the reason for the “one star” isn’t good enough. What, your server openly insulted the appearance of your baby and then swept up the pile of Saltines from underneath the high chair and violently dumped them on said baby? Sure, give them one star. The ceiling caved in on your Bloomin’ Onion at Outback Steakhouse and the manager didn’t so much as offer you a moist towelette to wipe the plaster from your face? One star, for sure. But you had to drink your iced tea without any sweetener? C’mon. Tommy L. From Yoakum, Texas. That’s not a good enough reason to give one star to Olive Garden.

In case you haven’t heard, restaurants are struggling lately. Between staffing shortages and customers generally being insensitive assholes, it’s not an easy time to be running a restaurant right now. Although so many people keep saying they want to support their local restaurants and see them succeed again, they continue to go online to post negative reviews about them for really stupid reasons.

Case in point is Nesa S. who went to Applebee’s and then left this 1-star review on Yelp: “I usually come to this Applebee’s and was so disappointed that my pasta was under cook. I didn’t get to enjoy my food. On top of that I spoke highly of it that I made my girl get one as well felt bad that she didn’t get to enjoy it.”

Ignoring the poor grammar, the biggest offense with this review is that this person “usually” goes to the Applebee’s and enjoys the pasta, but this one occasion when it didn’t live up to their expectations, they felt the need to complain online rather than ask someone there to simply remake the pasta. Try again Nesa.

And what about Awilda B. who left this 1-star review for The Cheesecake Factory in Queens? “Is the first time i order thru DoorDash and i made mistake with the address, and noone was telling me so they dont want to delivery, and i ask the manager if i can pick up the food, and he say no after i pay 100 something dollar, i lose my money bcause they didnt want to give me nothing back. Service are really bad. And they not helping costumer at all.” My god, Awilda, please stop with the run-on sentences and bad spelling and please stop blaming the restaurant because you don’t even know your own freaking address. If DoorDash picked up the food with your wonky ass address on it, the Factory Burrito Grande and Toasted Marshmallow S’mores Galore™ is no longer the responsibility of The Cheesecake Factory. That’s on you, buddy. Find a better reason to leave one star. But kudos to you for creating Yelp account for the sole purpose of leaving this bad review. You’re a horrible “costumer.”

Let’s now discuss Andrew F. who was unhappy with his visit to Pappasito’s Cantina in Houston, Texas. “Charging for salsa verde. Shame on you Pappasitos. That is ridiculous. Food is good, but already expensive enough. Bring back the free salsa verde! Staff is still pretty good.” So despite the good food and the good staff, the fact that he had to pay for salsa is enough to send them a 1-star review? Imagine the nerve of this restaurant actually making customers pay for the food they eat! What kind of business model is that?? Let’s take note that Andrew wrote this review in March of 2021, when restaurants were struggling to stay afloat. It’s hardly “ridiculous” that a restaurant decided that a bowl of freshly chopped tomatoes, onions, garlic, and cilantro that are served with a huge bowl of tortilla chips should be paid for. If you want free Mexican food, Andrew, try going to Taco Bell and loading up on those hot sauce packets. Save your bad Yelp reviews for something more serious.

Again, I’m not saying that a bad Yelp review isn’t sometimes warranted. What I am saying is that if you’re going to pull out your iPhone and go to town with a 1-star review, at least make sure it’s for a valid reason. Otherwise, you look like an idiot which you might very well be, but restaurants need your help these days. If your dining experience didn’t live up to your expectations, maybe give them another chance or at least give them the benefit of the doubt. And if you can’t say something nice, don’t say anything at all, alright?

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Bitchy Waiter

Bitchy Waiter

Darron Cardosa is a writer, actor, singer, and waiter. He lives and and works in New York City and enjoys "The Brady Bunch," "The Facts of Life" and cocktails almost as much as he hates your baby.