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30 Mar 2020

Bay Area Curve Stays Flattened, UCSF ER Stays Quiet

As confirmed cases of COVID-19 surge in other cities in the US, the Bay Area is experiencing an incredibly low rate of new cases by comparison.  For example, as of March 30th, New York City has 33,768 confirmed COVID-19 cases while San Francisco has 340 confirmed cases. John Hopkins University

Alex Mak - Managing Editor 0
30 Mar 2020

Kill Your Ego Before It Kills Someone Else

by Hannah Harkness Hey there, you down in the dark! Thank you for taking the time from your long fictional sports conversation with the stick figure you painted on the wall of your rented apartment to read my article. Personally, I’ve been in a basement room of my apartment I

Guest Writer 0
30 Mar 2020

How to Survive the Brutal, Doomed Horniness of Quarantining Single

by Laurie Riihimaki Quarantine in these times is necessary, and it actually seemed like a pretty fun idea at first. The introvert in all of us was screaming for joy when we were told to stay home and social distance from the rest of the world. In theory, this means

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30 Mar 2020

Notable Last Words I’m Thinking About for Some Reason

by Xan Holbrook Well, this is all a bit depressing, isn’t it? All snarking about being naturally introverted coming into its own aside, it really does feel as though Mother Gaia has had just about enough of our bullshit and does not care who in all of holy fuck she

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27 Mar 2020

SXSW, Roxie Theatre, and More Offering Amazing Streaming Movies

Unless your brain’s been melted by the lies of the Orange Skull and/or his enablers, you’re not going to begrudge the need for California’s shelter in place order. However, if you love supporting art film, you might wonder what you can do when the Bay Area’s art house theatres have

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26 Mar 2020

Study Finds PDA is 47% More Annoying During a Pandemic

A new study shows that people who put on Public Displays of Affection are on the hot seat this week.  As scientists have proven that ‘PDA’, while annoying in a normal year, has become 47% more annoying during a pandemic. “Social distancing is a serious thing,”said scientist Dr. Sara Adans. 

Alex Mak - Managing Editor 0
26 Mar 2020

Man Furious to Find Other People Enjoying Park During Quarantine

Despite the government’s shelter in place order, directing citizens to stay at home unless they need to “PROVIDE OR RECEIVE CERTAIN ESSENTIAL SERVICES”.  People still seem to be taking walks in parks periodically, and still seem to be walking their dogs and exercise outside their homes. Local man Kenneth Buttress

Alex Mak - Managing Editor 0
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