Ugh, rich people. They’re always making us regular Joes feel so goddamn… poor. They drive around in their fancy-schmancy white stretch limos, eating caviar and endangered, baby mammals with their pinky sticking out, all while perpetually drowning in a sea of diamonds and mink stoles (paws still attached, of course).

So, it’s Valentine’s week (Yes, it’s an entire week now. Sorry.) and I don’t care if you’re fully ball-n-chained or single and swinging that thang all over the city, one thing V-day evokes in every last warm-blooded human being is the desire to get… some. You know what I’m talking about,

  Howdy, brokesters… apologies for the lack of TBC musings as of late. Happy new year and shit. If you follow me on Twitter/are stalking me in real life, you know that I spent the holiday season getting blotto in my beloved home state of Wisconsin. Yes, America’s darling Dairyland. Land

The sentiment known as “love/hate” is one of the most ubiquitous yet enigmatic phenomenons in the human experience. I am certainly no stranger to its insidious, backhanded ways. Raw onions, ex-lovers, the mélange of scents permeating the city on a hot day, Peter Gabriel… you get the idea. For broke-ass

Last weekend, my friend Heather and I spent four days as pretend hillbillies.  We’ve always wanted to go to the Deep South– land of deliciously heavy foods, porch drinking, adorable floppy-lipped hound dogs, and people with two first names and cousins for lovers (let’s forget the racism and gross ignorance

Shortly after graduating college, I found myself in an “identity crisis.”  I realized that I had spent the last four years of my life writing analytical essays about “thingness” or whatever other words I could add -ness to the end of, and over-using the word “utterly” to make myself sound

It’s almost dangerous that I live around the corner from the Heart & Dagger Saloon in the Grand Lake neighborhood of Oakland, because a mere glimpse of it makes me want to forget my woes-of-the-moment and relax in the perfect Oakland weather. When you first walk inside, it looks like