Me: I think I’m actually going to post about being romantic. She: Now that’s something I’d like to read… People love to fit things, especially other people, into boxes. It makes sense. We understand the world through contrast and binary. If something’s not good, it’s: ______. If something’s not hot,

There’s nothing better than seeing the slow, costumed, trudge home that people make the morning after an event like Halloween or Bay to Breakers. Seeing a dude in a slutty banana outfit doing the walk of shame is priceless; truly one of the best man made spectacles on earth. But

We all know that anything that comes out of a woman (other than relentless orgasms) is completely unnatural and disgusting. If that wasn’t the case, then jokes about it would seem hackneyed and unoriginal. But women must really like bleeding out their vag, otherwise why would they spend 11.4% of their lives

Generally before I make any decisions in life, I ask myself one important question: What would Ryan Lochte Do? I’ve always wanted to be a world class idiot (and swimmer) with his own reality show, and everyone knows Lochte is so fast because he shaves his whole body. After all, that’s how

While I haven’t lived in San Diego since 1999, I grew up there and go back to visit three to five times a year. My family still lives there, as do a ton of friends, so even though I’m not dialed in like I am in New York or San

When I tell people who I used to be, they don’t believe me. And not just because I used to be black. It’s because I was withdrawn, lacking in all things self-esteem, clad in Matrix gear (complete with trenchcoat), and emphatically Christian. People who knew me then hardly recognize me

By Martin Shen For the first time in my life I feel old. Not like forty-old. My joints don’t hurt just yet. And, I’m definitely not thinking about my 401k. I still feel reasonably irresponsible and reckless enough, but there’s something about no longer being in your early twenties that