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Ohio Governor Offering $1 Million Vaccine Lotteries, Ohioans Are Furious

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The nutjob Buckeye State of Ohio has the rarest of things — a Republican governor who has done magnificent work with COVID-19 restrictions. Naturally, Ohio Republicans despise him for this. And now, in hopes of getting as many Ohians as possible vaccinated, today Ohio governor Mike DeWine announced a $1 million vaccination lottery where 5 lucky vaccinated Ohiaoans would win $1 million each, and every resident of the state who’s had the shot will be eligible.  

Surely vaccine-hesitant Ohians would be intrigued, and sign up for their shot at $1 million, right? Let’s take a look at their reactions!

The original post above is from losing 2018 U.S. Senate candidate Jim Renacci, who’s expected to try to primary DeWine, so you’d expect this shit from him. But many anti-vaxxers are claiming it’s “discrimination” that they are not also eligible for the million-dollar prize. 

Also-repeatedly-unsuccessful Senate candidate Josh Mandel lost his shit, too. Mandel is eagerly trying to suck Trump’s dick for an endorsement in the 2022 Senate race, and very hilariously, Trump enjoys publicly humiliating him instead

And let’s hear from Congress’ second-or-third biggest pedophile enabler, representative Gym Jordan. As Jimmy Kimmel noted last month, “The closest Jim Jordan ever got to being an infectious disease expert is contracting scabies on a wrestling mat.”

The thing that drives right-wingers nuts is that they’ve been proven so thoroughly wrong on everything about COVID. The Ohio governor’s gambit means he’s surely going to persuade a few more right-wingers to give up their anti-vaccination battle, which will reduce their ranks, further enraging the anti-vaxxers.

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Joe Kukura- Millionaire in Training

Joe Kukura- Millionaire in Training

Joe Kukura is a two-bit marketing writer who excels at the homoerotic double-entendre. He is training to run a full marathon completely drunk and high, and his work has appeared in the New York Times and Wall Street Journal on days when their editors made particularly curious decisions.