AdviceArts and CultureNewsSan FranciscoShopping, Style and Beauty

All The Different “Black Mirror: Bandersnatch” Endings, Ranked

Updated: Jan 03, 2019 10:10
The Bay's best newsletter for underground events & news

Our Tech Column was made possible by the fine folks at Mozilla Firefox.  The nonprofit Mozilla Foundation believes the Internet must always remain a global public resource that is open and accessible to all.  And that’s why we love Firefox.


Image: Netflix

There are 12 possible endings to Netflix Black Mirror: Bandersnatch, and you only die in two of them! You can create an ending where you successfully produce a blockbuster five-star video game hit, you can kill and dismember fellow cast members, or you could have sexy combat with your attractive therapist. None of these result in objectively “happy” endings. But we’ve gone through each outcome and ranked every possible Bandersnatch ending below, along with the steps you need to take to achieve these finales.

NOTE: There are Bandersnatch spoilers in this article — it is nothing but Bandersnatch spoilers!!

Image: ChrispySilva via Reddit

We navigated through each ending with the story flow chart from Reddit user Alpine seen below (There are also versions here and here, but we found Alpine’s to be most reliable) to rank each possible ending or “reset” from worst to best outcome. But we only explain the endings; the acting, cinematography, and other beautiful directorial touches will still be revelations along your Bandersnatch journey.

Image: alpine via Reddit

12, 11, 10. BEAT THE SHIT OUT OF YOUR COMPUTER

Never choose the Destroy Computer option! It’s the 80s, people, there are no “cloud” backups. Three separate and very lame endings result from choosing Destroy Computer or Throw Tea Over Computer. You lose everything you’ve done and Bandersnatch is finished. Game Over, man.

 

9. TAKE PILLS AS ORDERED, SUCCEED BUT SUCK AT LIFE

One extremely boring path allows you to keep Stefan’s life sane and homicide-free. Take the pills when instructed like a good little boy, and enable the Powers That Be to control you. But you’ll end up a shitty programmer and the game will ask you to try again from the top. (You can get this ending by following these plotline instructions.)

8. ACCEPT JOB ON FIRST OFFER, BE TERRIBLE AT IT, START OVER

This is technically not an ending, but a “reset”; the interface automatically reboots you back to the to the start in a fairly clever way. You may have encountered this one pretty early on, and it’s a cunning tone-setter that gives you the gist of this 80s gamer alternate universe. (You can get this ending by following these plotline instructions.)

7. TAKE ACID, JUMP OFF A BUILDING, DIE

This is not a particularly great ending, because it results in a pretty short Bandersnatch episode viewing. But you do at least get to do some acid and enjoy a trippy scene before plummeting to your own death. (You can get this ending by following these plotline instructions.)

6. DIE SUBCONSCIOUSLY IN YOUR THERAPIST’S CHAIR

I suppose there is some emotional resolution here what with the whole mom-dying subtext, but this fairly lame ending does at least give you that visually fantastic “go through the mirror” scene that is not available in many of these plotlines. (You can get this ending by following these plotline instructions.)

Image: Alejandro_con_x via Reddit

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

5. KILL DAD, TURN YOURSELF IN, GO OUT UNSPECTACULARLY

You definitely get a rollicking ending in this version, even if turning yourself in seems like a shitty plot ending. But this course of events benefits tremendously from the humorous detail of the dog finding the dad’s corpse, a clever reference to a bit of dialog from early in the episode.  (You can get this ending by following these plotline instructions.)

Image: debradams via Reddit

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

4. THE SHITTY ‘WE WERE ACTORS ALL ALONG’ ENDING

It is generally weak as fuck when Hollywood pulls the whole “Oh, back to reality, we were just actors on a set the whole time” bullshit. And this ending is as feeble as it sounds, but offers one of the only plotlines with the extremely funny and ingenious “Netflix meta conversation” scene. (You can get this ending by following these plotline instructions.)

3. KICK-ASS FIGHT SCENE WITH YOUR THERAPIST AND YOUR DAD

Everyone goes completely out of character here, and it makes little logical sense for the tenor of this show to go all Marvel Cinematic Universe on you. But it is totally fun to watch, and highly recommended if you’re a fan of the therapist character. (You can get this ending by following these plotline instructions.)

 

2. KILL MORE PEOPLE, RUIN THE COMPANY, GO TO JAIL

OK yes obviously this is a very depressing ending. But it there is some satisfaction that you brought the company down with you, and this version contains the most of Colin (actor Will Poulter), who is just phenomenal. You even get the option to kill Colin here — intentionally, not as an acid dare — and there are other homicidal options too if maximum body count is your thing. (You can get this ending by following these plotline instructions.)

1. MAKE A PERFECT VIDEO GAME BUT CHOP UP YOUR FATHER

There is one and only one option where your game receives the full five-star rating! But for this outcome, it is necessary that you not only kill your father but also chop him up. Stefan suffers a pretty awful fate in a ‘third chapter’ afterwards, but then another ‘fourth chapter’ kicks in to make this ending extremely satisfying. (You can get this ending by following these plotline instructions.)

Previous post

Bay News: Surprise Santas, Missing Warriors, Big Hearts, Petty BS and Free Ice Cream

Next post

SF’s Good Looking People were at New August Hall for Roosevelt


Joe Kukura- Millionaire in Training

Joe Kukura- Millionaire in Training

Joe Kukura is a two-bit marketing writer who excels at the homoerotic double-entendre. He is training to run a full marathon completely drunk and high, and his work has appeared in the New York Times and Wall Street Journal on days when their editors made particularly curious decisions.