Most Popular

This is Why I Don’t Have a Good Post for Today

13 Dec 2009

0 2

The Bay's best newsletter for underground events & news

I don’t have anything good for you today. I’m a total wreck. Friday night was my birthday party. People gave me too much whiskey. I puked. Then I got up Saturday morning, still drunk, put on a Santa suit and drank for 12 hours.

I’m too old for this shit. This is all my fault and I know I deserve it, but fuck man, I’m a mess. So yeah, that’s it. I have nothing for you, no great cheap event, no funny list of the top 5 San Francisco stereotypes, nothing. Sorry about that. I hope you enjoy your day and never feel like I do right now. I need a cheeseburger.

Oh yeah, one more thing: Ain’t no Party like a Santa Party cuz a Santa Party has HOs!

Tags:hungover Santa Con

Broke-Ass Stuart - Editor In Cheap

Stuart Schuffman, aka Broke-Ass Stuart, is a travel writer, poet, TV host, activist, and general shit-stirrer. His website BrokeAssStuart.com is one of the most influential arts & culture sites in the San Francisco Bay Area and his freelance writing has been featured in Lonely Planet, Conde Nast Traveler, The Bold Italic, Geek.com and too many other outlets to remember. His weekly column, Broke-Ass City, appears every other Thursday in the San Francisco Examiner. Stuart’s writing has been translated into four languages. In 2011 Stuart created and hosted the travel show Young, Broke, and Beautiful on IFC and in 2015 he ran for Mayor of San Francisco and got nearly 20k votes.

He's been called "an Underground legend": SF Chronicle, "an SF cult hero":SF Bay Guardian, and "the chief of cheap": Time Out New York.

modal-check

Demo Title

Did you say Hypercolor?

Get Your Own Color Changing Shirt!

Get a rad color changing shirt when you support Broke-Ass Stuart's independent journalism!

This will close in 0 seconds

Manage your privacy

To provide the best experiences, we and our partners use technologies like cookies to store and/or access device information. Consenting to these technologies will allow us and our partners to process personal data such as browsing behavior or unique IDs on this site and show (non-) personalized ads. Not consenting or withdrawing consent, may adversely affect certain features and functions.
Click below to consent to the above or make granular choices. Your choices will be applied to this site only. You can change your settings at any time, including withdrawing your consent, by using the toggles on the Cookie Policy, or by clicking on the manage consent button at the bottom of the screen.

Functional Functional Always active

The technical storage or access is strictly necessary for the legitimate purpose of enabling the use of a specific service explicitly requested by the subscriber or user, or for the sole purpose of carrying out the transmission of a communication over an electronic communications network.

Preferences Preferences

The technical storage or access is necessary for the legitimate purpose of storing preferences that are not requested by the subscriber or user.

Statistics Statistics

The technical storage or access that is used exclusively for statistical purposes. The technical storage or access that is used exclusively for anonymous statistical purposes. Without a subpoena, voluntary compliance on the part of your Internet Service Provider, or additional records from a third party, information stored or retrieved for this purpose alone cannot usually be used to identify you.

Marketing Marketing

The technical storage or access is required to create user profiles to send advertising, or to track the user on a website or across several websites for similar marketing purposes.

Statistics

Marketing

Features

Always active

Always active

Manage options Manage services Manage {vendor_count} vendors Read more about these purposes

Manage options

{title} {title} {title}

Manage your privacy

To provide the best experiences, we use technologies like cookies to store and/or access device information. Consenting to these technologies will allow us to process data such as browsing behavior or unique IDs on this site. Not consenting or withdrawing consent, may adversely affect certain features and functions.

Functional Functional Always active

The technical storage or access is strictly necessary for the legitimate purpose of enabling the use of a specific service explicitly requested by the subscriber or user, or for the sole purpose of carrying out the transmission of a communication over an electronic communications network.

Preferences Preferences

The technical storage or access is necessary for the legitimate purpose of storing preferences that are not requested by the subscriber or user.

Statistics Statistics

The technical storage or access that is used exclusively for statistical purposes. The technical storage or access that is used exclusively for anonymous statistical purposes. Without a subpoena, voluntary compliance on the part of your Internet Service Provider, or additional records from a third party, information stored or retrieved for this purpose alone cannot usually be used to identify you.

Marketing Marketing

The technical storage or access is required to create user profiles to send advertising, or to track the user on a website or across several websites for similar marketing purposes.

Statistics

Marketing

Features

Always active

Always active

Manage options Manage services Manage {vendor_count} vendors Read more about these purposes

Manage options

{title} {title} {title}

Gimme Your Stinkin' Email

So I can send you awesome freebies, weird events, incredible articles, and gold doubloons (note: one of these is not true).

We Did It!

This is the beginning of a beautiful friendship...or at least frenemy-ship.

Smooches!

Donate

Please Support Our Work - The only thing that keeps us going is support from readers like you. Every contribution makes a huge difference.
DONATE NOW

Most Popular

This is Why I Don’t Have a Good Post for Today

Help me Celebrate My 44th Birthday!

Satire Website Accidentally Reports Actual News About Altoona McDonald’s

This is Why San Francisco is Such a Magical City

The 2025 SF Beer Passport is Here!

More Festivus Fun: Holiday Markets and Light-Up Brooklyn

Stick It To Me - An Ode to Mod Podge

Broke-Ass Stuart - Editor In Cheap

Why are Influencers Crossing Hotel Strike Picket Lines?

How Isabella Manfredi’s New Show Wardrobe Invites Us Into The Importance Of Clothing

Monkeybrains: Providing Free Internet to Low-Income Residents in SF

Giving Tuesday: How to Ensure Your Donation Actually Helps

Charges Against Golden Gate Protesters Largely Dismissed

Dungeons, Dragons, and Drag Queens: Let’s Ride

Performer You Should Know: The Radiant Lily Diamond

Behind-the-Scenes with the Talented Cast of the Dickens Fair

Alcatraz Day Tours: Buy 1 Get 1 Tickets FREE for Locals!

Best Bay Area Events 12.17-1.6

Sequels I Want Wiped From Our Collective Memory

The Best Wild Animal Videos To Put Your Mind at Ease During COVID

How to know if YOU are a Karen : A Meme History

Around the World, Wild Animals Appearing on City Streets

How Drag Pageants Have Changed! The 1990’s to the Digital Now

Most Popular

This is Why I Don’t Have a Good Post for Today

You Might Also Like

Help me Celebrate My 44th Birthday!

Satire Website Accidentally Reports Actual News About Altoona McDonald’s

This is Why San Francisco is Such a Magical City

The 2025 SF Beer Passport is Here!

More Festivus Fun: Holiday Markets and Light-Up Brooklyn

Stick It To Me - An Ode to Mod Podge

Broke-Ass Stuart - Editor In Cheap

Gimme Your Stinkin' Email

We Did It!