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A love letter from the internet

Updated: Jun 26, 2017 09:08
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So this is the email I got the other day from a guy named Todd:

vile low dirty nasty hetero narcissistic self-aggrandizing ugly inferior overweight squalid disgusting vicious homophobic cunt.

GAY PRIDE WORLDWIDE 365 DAYS A YEAR. TOMORROW BELONGS TO US. NOT BIGOTS LIKE YOU.

Hey Todd-

Vile? Not Really. Low? Occasionally. Dirty? More like foul mouthed. Hetero? Can’t help it, I was born that way. Narcissistic? Absolutely. Self-aggrandizing? Yeah, I’m the shit. Ugly? I’ve seen worse. Inferior? To whom? Overweight? I call it a beer belly. Squalid? When left to my own devices, yes. Disgusting? In a charming sort of way. Vicious? Almost never. Homophobic? Come on dude, I’ve got the gayest family in the world. Cunt? Sure, why not?

Honestly Todd, if you’ve read anything I’ve ever written and not picked up on the immense amount of sarcasm and tongue & cheek humor, maybe reading is just not your thing. Seriously man, chill out and laugh a little; the world is a funny place.

-Stuart

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Broke-Ass Stuart - Editor In Cheap

Broke-Ass Stuart - Editor In Cheap

Stuart Schuffman, aka Broke-Ass Stuart, is a travel writer, poet, TV host, activist, and general shit-stirrer. His website BrokeAssStuart.com is one of the most influential arts & culture sites in the San Francisco Bay Area and his freelance writing has been featured in Lonely Planet, Conde Nast Traveler, The Bold Italic, Geek.com and too many other outlets to remember. His weekly column, Broke-Ass City, appears every other Thursday in the San Francisco Examiner. Stuart’s writing has been translated into four languages. In 2011 Stuart created and hosted the travel show Young, Broke, and Beautiful on IFC and in 2015 he ran for Mayor of San Francisco and got nearly 20k votes.

He's been called "an Underground legend": SF Chronicle, "an SF cult hero":SF Bay Guardian, and "the chief of cheap": Time Out New York.