Have Booze Passport. Will Drink for Cheap

No money for a flight to Scotland to sample 30 year-old scotch? Forgot to save up for that luxury Tuscan wine tour, $22,000 cocktail, or whatever the hell else rich people do to get loaded?

Don’t worry those young, broke and beautiful little heads of yours, we’ve got you covered: a three-month drunk-cation with the NYC Good Beer and Good Cocktail Passports. Each priced at $37, these little babies are your, well, passport to the wonderful world of NYC booze from July 1st to September 7th.

The Good Beer Passport:

Sponsored by Good Passports, Pintley, and BeerMenus, this entitles you to one pint (or flight or bottle) of craft beer at over 35 bars, restaurants, and breweries. Pick it up at seven different locations across all five boroughs (including two in Manhattan and even one in Jersey City!) You’ll also receive invites to special tasting events featuring local breweries like Sixpoint, The Bronx Brewery, and SingleCut. This past Tuesday’s event included FREE admission to a comedy show at The Stand. Get yours here.

The Good Cocktail Passport:

Get an early start on your National Rum Month celebration with one summer-themed cocktail (or neat pour of liquor) from 21 NYC bars and restaurants. Pick it up at one of four locations, two in Manhattan and two in Brooklyn (sorry, other boroughs, guess you’re just not fuckin’ classy enough). You’ll also get invites to special cocktail parties and tasting events like Tiki Tuesdays and a National Rum Day Party on August 16th.

Get it here (your cocktail must be made with one of the participating spirts, so be sure to check out the list before buying).

Important questions readers are asking:

Is it worth it?

Because you shouldn’t have to do simple math during summer (or any math ever), we’ve done it for you. According to our painstaking calculations, with these passports you could potentially imbibe up to 30 FREE beers or 18 FREE cocktails!

Who’s benefiting from my alcoholism?

The Good Beer Passport is a fundraiser for The River Fund New York, and part of your money also goes to the Heritage Radio Network. The Good Cocktail Passport supports Friends of Firefighters and God’s Love We Deliver (a charity delivering meals to the sick and NOT a creepy cult, as it turns out).

Should I still tip my bartender? Am I a terrible piece of human garbage if I don’t?

Yes.

What’s a Tiki Tuesday?

We’re not sure either, but we want to go to there.

image courtesy of Quinn Dombrowski, Flickr