Fear and Loathing in NYC: 5 Things We Hate Yet Love About the Big Apple
This place is terrible.
No really, it is.
I’ve encountered some of the harshest, brutal, no good kinds of denizens that inhabit this city. Whether it is people not saying “Please” or “Thank You” when you are in need of, or giving away a subway seat, to those hipsters living in Park Slope (you know, the ones who have those man-buns and insist on riding anywhere in Brooklyn via a Penny farthing). It can get pretty unforgivable living in a city that should really take a NyQuil and hit the hay once in a while.
We take for granted many things here because it’s nasty, ridiculous, or annoying. But you know, perspective is reality. There are some things we love to hate and other things we hate to love, so here are top 5 unique New Yorker spectacles that are terrible, but make this place worth living.
1. Cheap Pizza
When you are a lowly college student and musician, you’re more than broke dude, you are on some transcendental kind of brokenness. So it only makes sense to spend your hard earned dollar bill from however you earned it on a slice of pizza. Dollar slice pizza shops are spread all throughout the city.
Yeah, I know, a dollar pizza isn’t exactly an experience straight from Venice. This stuff can get real bad if you consume it on a constant basis, but fuck you, man. I am hungry, and I need to fill up this stomach, no matter what my intestines will say afterwards.
Back at my hometown in the Tri-State area, you would never find a dollar slice pizza anywhere (and if you did, it was highly suspect), so I find it quite an amazing feat that 21st Century Capitalism, no matter how one views it, can pump out some well needed grub on the cheap. If you are like me you tend to head on over to 2 Bros Pizza on St.Mark’s after a show, spend $5 on two pepperoni slices and a can of Dr.Pepper, and be set for a good night’s sleep (unless your rectum has other plans).
2. Solitude is your roommate
God damn, it can get lonely out here even with a city filled with millions of people to talk to (or not cause they are people). You can feel pretty alone in your thoughts if you live in a studio, with no one to really talk to. In fact, you start staring out the bus window listening to Elliott Smith thinking if life is really worth living (or if you want to pretend you’re in a music video).
But damn, if you’re an introvert, it’s great. You can experience this whole city to yourself and not a soul could bother you. Head to the museum! Visit an art gallery! Piss on the L train! You too can do all of these things before the sudden feeling of loneliness overcomes your soul while you pray for the infinite abyss to swallow you whole!
3. Noise, noise, noise
It could be 2 in the morning on a Wednesday and these cop cars keep roaming around the neighborhood with the alarm on and it is driving you up the wall. You could have lost your iPod and may be forced to hear the deafening sounds of the subway train passing by. It could be a decent Sunday afternoon and you are watching The Dark Knight while the upstairs neighbors are blasting their Yanni records. Which makes hearing anything Christian Bale says with that gravely Batman voice much more difficult (WHERE ARE THEY?).
Though, on the bright side, it is an acknowledgment that there is always something going on here in the city. It is nice to know that there are bars and delis open practically all the time with someone to complain to behind the counter. Sometimes it is nice to just do that in the middle of the night.
4. Subway Performers
Have to admit, when I first moved in here, I generally was pretty indifferent to subway performers. They were not bothersome to me, but at the same time I would not mind if they did not pop up from time to time.
But then after I heard the two-man mariachi band that plays on my 7 train for a while, I realized, “Holy shit, these are people like me, why am I behaving like this?” These are folks, who for some of them, are truly down in the dumps and they could be singing their hearts out on the songs they sing. So I try to hand them whatever money I could spare, whether it be a nickel or a dollar or whatever, I would hand it to them. In all seriousness, these folks put in a lot of effort to what they do. So whenever there is some guy or duo giving an impromptu performance, hand them something, it will mean a lot.
5. Metropolitan Transit Authority
Actually, this one is a joke, there is nothing to love about the MTA.
New York City is a hellish place to be in, but sometimes it’s nice to be hellish.