Hungry, Lazy Bear’s Guide to Sonoma County

PHOTOS AND WORDS BY ANDY SAMWICK

I make an annual excursion trip to Lazy Bear Week (not the restaurant), an event that takes over the town of Guerneville each summer. The event hosts thousands of bear friends (burly, hairy, thicker men) and their admirers. They come from all over the world to lounge at several of the local resort’s pool parties and warm up at bonfires at night. For the second year in a row — I have been to at least 20 of the 27 events they have hosted since 1996 — I stayed in a cabin at Johnson’s Beach in Guerneville which makes it pretty convenient to get to all the festivities, especially the Sunset Tea Dances that took place on Johnson’s Beach both Friday and Saturday. The camping/cabin resort assembled this stage a few years ago, right along the Russian River and it is becoming the new tradition to watch the sunset and moonrise while dancing into the evening. It’s important to know the best places for breakfast, coffee, beer, and pizza when a San Franciscan heads north.

I got up on Thursday, August 3rd this year, versus last year’s “Early Bear Special” when I arrived on Monday and left on Wednesday, when things really started to get going. In a similar fashion to the last few summers, on my way up to the Russian River, I stopped in Sebastopol for Retrograde Coffee. This coffee is worth driving the 27 minutes each morning from Johnson’s Beach, which I did from last Friday to Monday on my way home. Retrograde was recommended to me by JoEllen Depakakibo from Pinhole Coffee a few years ago and she knows a thing or two about coffee. I immediately jumped at a chance to visit and have been going back as often as I visit the area. It feels like the bohemia of San Francisco’s past right there in this cozy colorful cafe. Beside the excellent service I consistently receive time and time again, the consistent quality of espresso and coffee is top-tier. The shop has its cortado game dialed in like no other roaster in Northern California; I had at least one each morning.

Your writer lounging with guitarist Paul Albert Masvidal.

Another ritual of these excursions are my visits to Windsor for Pizzaleah. For the past three Lazy Bear Weeks, I have brought several hungry bears (again, burly men, not animals) to join me on my venture. I went on my way up to Guerneville that first Thursday, after my Retrograde cortado, and had their Nico Pie with olive oil, mozzarella, roasted garlic cloves, fresh rosemary, cracked black pepper, and shaved parmesan. I washed each delicious slice down with some of their fresh rotating tapped local beers, like the Russian River Brewing Company’s Velvet Glow and the Cooperage Curt Pale Ale. And when I went back to close the trip out on Sunday evening with a friend, we were blown away by their seasonal, new special pie, The Sungold with vodka sauce, Sungold tomatoes, burrata, fresh basil, and chili flakes. That, along with the arugula caprese and their garlic knots, and we were full belly bears!

After my first pool parties last Thursday at both the R3 Hotel and the West Sonoma Inn, I drove 53 minutes to St. Helena for the infamous and decorated Charter Oak burger I heard I needed to try. Man, it was solid. You do get the scent of “the cheeseburger” like the San Francisco Chronicle mentioned when you enter their dining room. It’s a smash— literally— with double thin perfectly assembled patties, cheese, diced onions, garnished with a jalapeno relish. Chef Christopher Kostow offers his riff on a diner burger with the best take on those classic ingredients. He generously offers it on his specials during happy hour as well. It was past the allotted time frame, but I was still happy to pay full price! Also, who can resist a hearth oven?! You must try the corn on the cob while it’s still in season as it gets grilled in the wood fire. Their cocktail menu is also on fire with drinks like their simply put tequila and strawberry. This summer drink takes advantage of the small but bountiful strawberry season and marries it with some Lunazul blanco tequila, a little orgeat, and some fresh squeezed lime juice.¡Espléndido! 

On Friday, a lot of my fellow bear friends met up for a hiking activity at Armstrong Woods Reserve Visitor Center for a flat two mile round trip hike to learn about the redwoods. I hiked down to the majestic Della Fattoria’s Downtown Cafe, recently named amongst “one of the best places to get bread in the country.” This notoriety is nothing new to this legendary business that was really the first on the West Coast to commercially produce bread baked in a wood-burning oven, back before they opened to the masses in 1995. I discovered them when we opened Bar Agricole in 2010, the same year they were honored by Bon Appétit for being one of the top 10 bread bakeries In America. Normally, I skip the whole idea of breakfast, but when you put the word sandwich after it, I succumb. Hence, I fell super hard for their signature Della Fattoria Breakfast Bunwich, cause I’ll admit, I am a “bun guy.” To be honest, anything on their menu is worth the drive. This particular breakfast sandwich comes with a poached egg, cheddar, Caggiano ham, and aioli on a Della burger bun. It is super light, almost fluffy. It has that amazing popular bun (also available in four-packs to-go) and poof, it disappeared in my mouth. I was off to my second breakfast.

I immediately was greeted with a smile from Clare Abrams, one half of the couple that makes Ethel’s Delicatessen. She remembered me from the Ferry Building Farmers Market when we first met a couple years back, before they had this storefront. In fact, according to her husband, chef Nicolas Abrams, who also welcomed me warmly, they have only really been open since June. And with the specific oven he chose and his particular technique, he is still  “ just getting started.” But even fellow bagelmakers like local hero Pearl are very impressed. I got to stop by and have a reunion with Wine Country’s “best kept secret” Pearl’s co-owner Annette Yang that Sunday and caught up on all the town favorites. More on that later… Ethel’s Delicatessen stems from a pandemic pop-up that became one of most sought out wholesale options. It was such a joy to see them these last years popup from local farmers markets. But then also seeing them on menus in cafes as close to where I live, like the charming Neighbor’s Corner, for example. For that second breakfast, I opted for their parmesan and black pepper bagel topped with black garlic & sherry schmear. The combo was fantastic and I can’t wait to go back for more of their deli items like their loaves of organic challah and their SF Deli Rye and get a half pound of that locally-smoked natural wagyu pastrami. Their signature TriBECA breakfast sandwich sounds out of this world-served on a bagel or bread of your choosing. It comes toasted with an organic scrambled egg, natural thick-cut bacon, organic tomato, organic sharp cheddar cheese, and organic homemade garlic aioli. 

Friday afternoon between the pool parties and the Tea Dance at Johnson’s Beach, I walked over to the recently reopened Dawn Ranch for a light bite. Boy, the memories of Lazy Bear’s past came back to me immediately as I walked up the staircase and into the bar. This property was once called Fife’s and they allowed campers and hosted a majority of the pool parties and other events like the legendary dances at the defunct “Bunkhouse.” Such great times were had! I was wearing my Espresso F*n Martinis shirt, which I recently purchased at a speakeasy called Offsuit in Boston, and Dawn Ranch’s bartender took it as a challenge, so I caved and ordered one. Their Russian River Espresso Martini is made with 360 Madagascar Vanilla Vodka, Mr. Black Coffee Liqueur, cold brew, espresso, and simple syrup. It paired well with their savory French toast with burrata, roasted and cherry tomatoes on marinara bathed brioche. It was just the right snack to give me my evening’s energy to go dancing with my friends.

The next morning I contemplated the Yoga Morning Rejuvenation class I heard whispers about at Dawn Ranch when I was at the bar, but instead decided to drive to Healdsburg for my morning coffee at Flying Goat Coffee. As I sipped on their cortado, I began craving something savory. So I stretched my mileage even further and drove back up to St. Helena, this time for the Model Bakery’s breakfast sandwich. I have loved their Original since the first time I had it at their original location in Napa. The sandwich highlights what Model Bakery is known for: it’s English muffin! It comes stacked with scrambled eggs, Canadian bacon, and cheddar cheese. You know it has to be good because of that hour drive back to Guerneville. On my way back, I had to stop for the infamous Bloody Macgregor with bacon infused scotch at Solbar at one of Solage’s dining rooms in Calistoga. It was the strong and savory hair of the dog I needed.

After some pool party crawling from the Poolin’ Around party at R3 Hotel to the Splash Zone party at West Sonoma Inn, I decided to stay local and went to Brot for dinner. Established in 2019, boon eat + drink owner Crista Luedtke offers a similar German bierhalle style restaurant to the one her parents ran when she was a kid. Brot offers some great traditional favorites like the herring, spatzle, and currywurst, and I wanted something robust so I went for their pork schnitzel and fries, bedecked by curry ketchup and haus mayonnaise. Paired with a traditional draft of Schneider Weisse, I was good to go to the final Sunset Dance Party of the weekend.

A lot of bears check out Sunday morning and I was no exception. After packing the car, I decided to do the drive to Sebastopol for Retrograde coffee again and then onwards to Petaluma to meet a friend for brunch at that place Pearl, I mentioned earlier. “Now this is the joint,” I said to myself as I pulled up early to have a Cappelletti Spritz at the bar. Annette Yang and I immediately recognized each other from her former San Francisco restaurant Nettie’s Crab Shack, of which I was a constant patron. And what a pleasant surprise, because I knew the food was going to be sourced with fine local ingredients, so now I was really getting excited while perusing the menu’s offerings. When my friend arrived, he and I settled — after much debate — on three savory items because, apparently, it is common to do this, according to Yang. Local sand dabs were a must, thanks to the Eater recommendation.

Holy Mole! They were insanely good, with these great, long beans and some grilled beets to boot. I was dead! Up next, the freshest seafood salad with ample amounts of shrimp, tuna, and an amazing fish cake on a bed of glorious greens with just the right touch of dressing to keep the flavors in the correct ensemble. And then, of course, we had to share the restaurant’s griddled porchetta sandwich. We made enough space to enjoy warm brioche doughnuts with a citrus goat cheese for dessert, topped in peach apricot jam that just melts in your mouth along with a Cold Fashioned (cold brew, muddled cherry and orange bitters). Scrumptious and satisfying, you really must make the trek to this darling spot. I can’t believe they’ve been open for five years and I am just discovering this beauty. 

It was great to have this incredible adventure while also socializing with friends and enjoying the events of Lazy Bear. I loved mixing it up both on the dance floor and with all stops I made through Sonoma County. I am certainly not going to wait till next summer to make excuses to go back and frequent some of these gems.

Andy Samwick is a bon vivant who brings decades of food and beverage insight to the table.