The word “spinster” is trending on Twitter, reminding women everywhere that it was not long ago when society would order you a wide selection of moo moos, blue hair dye and more than a few cats if you hadn’t snagged you a husband by the ripe old age of 23.

I’ve somehow made it to the point where philanthropic organizations for rich people like to give me tickets to giveaway to their big, shmancy events. I don’t know how I got here, but I dig it baby. Anyways, do you know about the Spinsters of San Francisco? They are a