Cheap Entertainment Options! or Let’s Just Face It: Everything in NYC is Expensive

You know, just because you’re stuck paying off your student loans until those silvery white streaks start showing up on your receding hairline (you know, the kind that only look good on John “Silver Fox” Slattery) – doesn’t mean you can’t have a little fun too. You know the saying: Everyone’s gotta eat; we just don’t all get to eat caviar. Or wait, I might have just made that up. Anyway, screw all that fancy shit! In the spirit of optimism, here are some low-cost entertainment alternatives for you to ponder whilst you slurp your twenty-five cent Ramen!

You’d think that those with even a slightly disposable amount of income can afford a movie at the theater, right?! Guess again. In our fair city, a movie in a typical theater will cost you 13 bones, and that’s only 2-D. If you want waterfalls shooting directly into your eyeballs, the 3-D screenings can put you out 20 bucks or more. At this rate, you’ll never be able to afford dinner, a.k.a.: Ramen. Forget the movies; how about browsing the huge ass book selection at the Barnes & Noble on Union Square? Wait, a minute what’s this you say? Buying a brand new paperback book costs one on average $15?! That’s more than the damn movie! Shit. OK well how about this:

Ah, the Strand. Eighteen glorious miles of books! For those not familiar, The Strand is a bookstore that sells gently used books below typical retail cost. Their claim to fame is that the “guts” of books that wind up throughout the store equal up to eighteen miles. Upon glancing at their webpage, it looks as if they’re selling Fifty Shades of Grey (if you’re into all that) for … fifteen dollars!? Shiza! For all you non-math nerds out there, that’s EXACTLY THE SAME as the Barnes & Noble price. I SWEAR I’ve gotten deals at the Strand, but if you don’t want to take my word for it, here’s something else to try:

That’s right ladies and gents, libraries are still a thing. And good news – they are free to use! All you have to do is go in and fill out an application, have a valid form of ID and a piece of mail showing that you live in the borough of whichever library you’re applying for (FYI, Manhattan Public Library and Brooklyn Public Library are not interchangeable). Just be careful with those late charges – I once made the mistake of renting 3 new-release DVDs and returned them for a measly 4 days past the due date and racked up a fine of $36!!! They charge you $3 a day PER DVD. Oy. So in my case, I might have been better off just going to the movies. Damn.