All The Lyrics They Had To Censor From ‘WAP’ At The Grammys

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Screenshot: CBS/Paramount

The first ever live performance of “WAP” went down (haha) Sunday night at the 63rd Annual Grammy Awards. But when Cardi B and Megan Thee Stallion performed the number on live television — surprise! — they had to edit out a few lyrics. We did a word-for-word comparison of the lyrics to the original song “WAP” and the version that aired Sunday night on network television to reveal every bit they edited out.

The full Megan Thee Stallion and Cardi B performance was 8 minutes and 36 seconds, and included four tracks total. The set is a fabulous performance, and is included at the bottom of this post. But for the purposes of this exercise, we are only considering  the lyrics to “WAP,” which starts at the 1:30 mark of the video below. We’ve gone through and noted every edit that they made to “WAP” so they could perform it on network television.

I said, certified freak

Seven days a week

Wet [and gushy]

Make that pull-out game weak, woo (ah)

Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah

Yeah, you [dealing] with some wet [wet wet]

Bring a [deleted] and a mop for this wet [wet wet]

Give me everything you got for this wet [wet wet]

Beat it up, [baby], catch a charge

Extra [deleted] and extra [deleted]

Put this [kitty] right in your face

Swipe your nose like a credit card

Hop on top, I wanna ride

I do a kegel [I’m gonna ride]

[Look at] my mouth, look in my [thighs]

[It’s what] is wet, come take a dive

Tie me up like I’m surprised

Let’s role play, I’ll wear a disguise

I want you to park that big Mack truck

Right in this little garage

Make it cream, make me scream

Out in public, make a scene

I don’t cook, I don’t clean

But let me tell you how I got this ring (ayy, ayy)

Gobble me, swallow me, drip down the side of me (yeah)

Quick, jump out ‘fore you let it get inside of me (yeah)

I tell him where to put it, never tell him where I’m ’bout to be

I’ll run down on him ‘fore I have a [deleted] running me (pow, pow)

Talk your [deleted], bite your lip (yeah)

Ask for a car while you ride that [deleted] (while you ride that [deleted])

You really ain’t never gotta [deleted] him for a thang (yeah)

He already made his mind up ‘fore he came (ayy, ah)

Now get your boots and your coat (ah, ah, ah)

For this wet [wet wet]

He bought a phone just for pictures

Of this wet [wet wet] (click, click, click)

Pay my tuition just to kiss me

On this wet [wet wet] (mwah, mwah, mwah)

Now make it rain if you wanna

See some wet [wet wet]  (yeah, yeah)

Look, I need a hard hitter, I need a [deleted]

I need a Henny drinker, I need a [woo!] smoker

Not a garden snake, I need a king cobra

With a hook in it, hope it lean over

He got some money, then that’s where I’m headed

[Cookie] A1, just like his credit

He got a beard, well, I’m tryna wet it

I let him [mmmm], now he diabetic

I don’t wanna [woop!], I wanna [deleted]

I wanna [deleted] I wanna [deleted]

I want you to touch that [touch that]

That swing in the back of my [deleted]

My [toe] game is fire, [Dasani] Dasani

It’s going in dry and it’s coming out soggy

I ride on that thang like the cops is behind me (yeah, ah)

[The way that I spit] now he tryna sign me, woo

[ENTIRE SECTION DELETED: “Your honor, I’m a freak bitch, handcuffs, leashes…”]

Now get your boots and your coat for this wet [wet wet]

Bring a bucket and a mop for this [wet wet]

I’m talking WAP, WAP, WAP

That’s some wet [wet wet]

[Make it rain if you wanna see some wet wet wet]

Now from the top, make it drop

That’s some wet [wet wet]

Now get a bucket and a mop

That’s some wet [wet wet]

I’m talking WAP, WAP, WAP

That’s some wet [wet wet]

Macaroni in a pot

That’s some wet [wet wet]

Of the 665 words in this abbreviated version of “WAP,” 201 words were removed or replaced. In other words, a full 30% of the lyrics to “WAP” were censored for network television.

One entire section of the song was deleted. Here are the lyrics to the deleted section:

Your honor, I’m a freak bitch, handcuffs, leashes

Switch my wig, make him feel like he cheating

Put him on his knees, give him something to believe in

Never lost a fight, but I’m looking for a beating (ah)

In the food chain, I’m the one that eat ya

If he ate my ass, he’s a bottom feeder

Big D stand for big demeanor

I could make you bust before I ever meet ya

If it don’t hang, then he can’t bang

You can’t hurt my feelings, but I like pain

If he fuck me and ask, “Whose is it?”

When I ride the dick, I’ma spell my name

Ah (whores in this house)

Yeah, yeah, yeah

Yeah, you fucking with some wet-ass pussy

Here is the full performance of Megan Thee Stallion and Cardi B at the Grammys.

Congratulations to Megan Thee Stallion for winning Best New Artist and Best Rap Song (with Beyoncé) at the 63rd Annual Grammy Awards.

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Joe Kukura- Millionaire in Training

Joe Kukura- Millionaire in Training

Joe Kukura is a two-bit marketing writer who excels at the homoerotic double-entendre. He is training to run a full marathon completely drunk and high, and his work has appeared in the New York Times and Wall Street Journal on days when their editors made particularly curious decisions.