Carrie Laven - Pretty Penniless

04 Sep 2012

Join Brooklyn Bridge Park’s Green Team, and Pretty Up Your Borough

Pretty, lush, green spaces can be hard to come by in New York City, so we might as well try to maintain the ones that we’ve got.  Besides environmental interests, us urban-dwellers might suffer from something that I like to call “feudalism withdrawals,” in which we experience intense desires to

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29 Aug 2012

The Differences Between Fourteen Year Old Me, and Twenty-Six Year Old Me

I’ve been re-watching a lot of old episodes of Freaks and Geeks with my Nick Andopolis/Sam Weir hybrid of a boy toy lately (all of the philosophical stoner wisdom of Andopolis without the clinginess, and the gentlemanly quality of Weir without the hairless pits– what more could a lady ask

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02 Dec 2024

The 90s Are Back! We Have Color Changing Shirts!

As 2024 winds down, we’re reflecting on another incredible year of sharing the stories, art, culture, and nightlife that make the Bay Area so unique. BrokeAssStuart.com wouldn’t be what it is without you—our community of readers, supporters, and believers in independent media. This year, instead of asking you to join Patreon

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22 Aug 2012

Living the Hillbilly Life and Loving It

Last weekend, my friend Heather and I spent four days as pretend hillbillies.  We’ve always wanted to go to the Deep South– land of deliciously heavy foods, porch drinking, adorable floppy-lipped hound dogs, and people with two first names and cousins for lovers (let’s forget the racism and gross ignorance

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21 Aug 2012

FREE Wine Tastings at Bottlerocket in Greenwich Village

Wine culture is honestly something that Two-Buck Chuck-swiggin’ simpleton like me just doesn’t understand, but I sure am willing to learn!  Especially when said wine is FREE.  For this reason, you can pretty much count on finding me slurring my words while clutching the shit out of a wine glass

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15 Aug 2012

Making Sense of the Perplexing World of Bro Fashion

Recently, I attended a surprise birthday party for my friend Kaitlin, and had a great time. Birthday Girl Kaitlin: stylish and sassy, as per usual. My friends: major babes, as per usual. The party location at the Standard Biergarten: teeming with hella bros. Yes, this is to be expected at

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01 Aug 2012

How to Karaoke Like a Pro Amateur Singer

First things first: I have never been a “wild child.”  During my teen years, I was a dedicated captain of my high school’s Quiz Bowl team– our post-match parties consisted of watching Team Member L do the “human pretzel” behind a dumpster in the Denny’s parking lot, and Team Member

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31 Jul 2012

FREE Zine Exhibition and Opening Celebration at Brooklyn College

Zines are a broke-ass creative’s best friend.  They’re hella cheap to make, independently published, and– just like Pokemon cards– super fun to collect and trade ‘cause you gotta catch ‘em all.  Zines are the best, which is why I am so excited for Brooklyn College Library’s new zine section (as

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25 Jul 2012

Embarrassing Things That Psychics Have Told Me

When you’re trying to figure your life out and workin’ hard and struggling to Rise to the Top and all of that good stuff, things can get a little… desperate.  So desperate, in fact, that you might feel the need to seek out some spiritual guidance.  No, no, no.  I

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