dating

23 Jul 2012

PDeXes and Why There is a Strong Possibility That We Are All Dying Alone*

GRRRR! Let’s date! Portland is not famous for it’s “people who are committed to just sleeping with one dude or chick for a presumably extended period of time” rate, let alone the amount of successful marriages. Whether you’re hanging out with someone in their mid-30s who is struggling not to overdose on

Chloe Newsom - Dive Bar Desperado 0
11 Jul 2012

In Search of a Sugar Daddy

Listen, I’m a simple girl with simple needs.  As long as I can scour my local Salvation Army for ill-fitting ethnic print dresses and eat a burrito at least once a week, I am pretty much satisfied.  But lately, times have gotten tough.  This girl is horribly underemployed, and my–

Carrie Laven - Pretty Penniless 0
10 Jul 2024

This New Literary Magazine is a Gift to the People of San Francisco

I’ve got some awesome news! We received a grant from the Civic Joy Fund to put out a literary magazine celebrating SF and acting to counter the stupid “Doom Loop” narrative. It’s a gift to the people of San Francisco. And after months of working on this project it’s now available

Broke-Ass Stuart - Editor In Cheap 0
02 Jul 2012

Drunk Texting Dos & Don’ts

So you think just because you’re not actually slurring your way through a drunken late night phone conversation that using the text messaging function on your telephonic device will make you appear less insane?  Think again, friend.  Drunk texting may even be WORSE, because although most of the time, you

Anna G - Caliburg Contributor 0
12 Jun 2012

Coming to Terms with Your Daddy Issues

Okay, actually, I mean my daddy issues.  And I don’t mean all of that psychological hoo-ha about abandonment and male authority figures or whatever.  I’m talking about having the hots for guys in khakis and Hawaiian shirts.  As soon as I see a strapping twentysomething in the same outfit that

Carrie Laven - Pretty Penniless 0
07 Mar 2012

Notes on a Nerd’s First Hardcore Show

Last weekend, I went to my first-ever hardcore show.  I was a serious geekazoid as a teenager, so I was too busy trying to get the high score on the next AP Bio test to buy black socks, become straightedge, and be in the throes of a steamy hardcore love

Carrie Laven - Pretty Penniless 0
15 Feb 2012

My Best (Worst) Get-Rich-Quick Ideas

You see, I’m what they call a “creative genius.”  I have a brain so out-of-control, half the time I can’t even make sense of the shit I come up with.  All I know is that I am constantly sprouting figurative light bulbs out the top of my dome, having what

Carrie Laven - Pretty Penniless 0
08 Feb 2012

Getting Stood Up at a Taco Truck

In honor of the upcoming Valentine’s Day, let’s talk about love. The happiness, the longing gazes, the tender moments shared. And sometimes: the drama, the emotional rollercoaster ride, the letdowns. Almost everyone has been in an intense relationship with someone who is Simply Not Good For Them, including myself. Except,

Carrie Laven - Pretty Penniless 0
07 Feb 2012

‘I Heart Nerds’ Speed Dating Party is Back!

I had a regular when I was a bartender. 33, classically gorgeous and a bar owner, he had a crush on me because I didn’t give a shit, i.e. wasn’t hot enough to be seen in public with.  He’d bring in every feminine cliche (Biracial Burlesque Performer, Marketing Intern Who

Nadine Friedman - Vice President of Snark 0